Caring Parent, Caring Kid: Planting the Seeds of Change in the Hearts and Minds of the Next Generation

When I was growing up, the furnace room in my parents' home doubled as a storage room for my Dad's massive slide collection. Every once in a while, Dad would venture downstairs, haul out the slide projector and massive screen and allow my sisters and I admittance to that almost unimaginable place: the world he and mom had inhabited before we were born.

One of his slide shows took us to South Carolina. In addition to the strange-looking trees and the much-younger looking parents (always a remarkable sight when you're a kid), we saw photos of signs that captured in a way that words could not the stark realities of segregation: images of WHITE – COLORED drinking fountains; or signs spelling out who could or couldn't walk through a particular door.

The conversations we had about those photos changed my life. They forged my values and set me on a path I continue to follow to this day through my work as a parenting author and someone who is passionate about social justice.

Tomorrow is going to be a day that our generation and our kids' generation will talk about and remember forever -- an ideal time to have a conversation with your kids about what inspires you, what infuriates you, and why.

Here are some of the types of conversations I've been having with my own kids lately. Perhaps one of these conversation threads might inspire a conversation of your own:

• - Why we need leaders who will be honest and accountable (and who will not mislead the people in an effort to save their own jobs) and why the people and the media need to hold our leaders accountable;
• - Why we can't expect leaders to be perfect (because no one is perfect) but we can expect them to admit their mistakes and change course when they realize that a mistake has been made;
• - Why we should expect our leaders to ensure that all people are treated with respect and live in dignity (which necessitates action on poverty, mental health, health care, social justice issues, etc.);
• - Why we need leaders of vision (who will do what is right for the long-term health of the Planet, the good of the economy, and the health and welfare of the people rather than just focusing on getting re-elected)
• - Why it is important to be an involved and active citizen (and that doesn't just mean showing up to vote on voting day; it means being informed about the issues, understanding how government works, and determining who is going to represent you at all levels of government);
• - Why we need to join with other families to find innovative environmental, economic, and social justice solutions at the community level. That way, each of those unique local solutions can, in turn, become a building block that brings Canada closer to becoming both environmentally and economically sustainable and a global leader in social justice, peace-keeping, and diplomacy.

I don't know about you, but I'm hoping that the political winds of change will prove to be contagious -- that Barack Obama's inauguration will encourage Canadians to dare to dream big once again. Just imagine what that could mean for our children and our country's future, to say nothing of the future of the Planet.

Comments

[Rod Bolton]

I have great hopes for Mr.Obama, but one thing worries me. In the short term at least,everything he does will be paid for with borrowed money. To be genuine care givers, we must be willing to pay our share of the cost. In the past we have seen great social programs started where the funding and sustaining is passed on to others groups in society or to future generations. This is no more good works than it would be to buy gifts for the needy with a credit card where you had no means or intention to pay off the bill when it came due. Mr.Obama inherits problems of great magnitude. I wish him well in inspiring others to join him in finding solutions.

[Ann Douglas]

There's no doubt about it: our leaders are dealing with massive challenges.

I'm encouraged by the fact that Obama is encouraging everyone to work together to be part of the solution. He's taking that message right down to the grassroots level: e.g., if there's something in your neighborhood that needs fixing, don't wait for someone else to take care of it. Do something about the issue yourself.

With regard to having to buy our way out of this recession, I think the big thing is to ensure that no dollars are wasted (that would be a total insult to the taxpayer) and to ensure that the dollars are invested in the ways that will jump-start the economy as quickly and effectively as possible. Carol Goar wrote an excellent column on this subject last week ("Tax cuts the third least effective alternative" - http://www.thestar.com/comment/columnists/article/570485 ).

Thanks for taking the time to drop by my blog to comment on this post -- and for all the other words of wisdom and life lessons you've given me over the past 45 years, Dad.

[canuckgirl]

A good resource I have found is "Above All, Be Kind: Raising a Humane Child in Challenging Times" by Zoe Weil. It is a resource to help you raise children who are caring, compassionate, self-confident and want to create a better world. I have used this book both as a parent and a teacher and find it amazing.

Another strategy I use is modeling. I make sure I am the person I want my son to be. Too often parents tell their children they should behave a certain way or do a certain thing..and then fail to do it themself. That gives children mixed messages.