Braces: A Love Story

My 12 year old is getting his braces on right now.

It's a pretty standard childhood rite-of-passage. I wore braces when I was a kid. (Ditto with elastics and the dreaded retainer.) Who knows? You may have done your time in the orthodontic trenches, too.

I didn't think anything of it when one of my other sons got his braces, but I'm a bit more nervous about how my 12 year old – my child who has Aspergers – is going to react, both to the process of getting the braces cemented on his teeth and the inevitable afterpains as his mouth gets used to the new hardware.

We discovered a long time ago that my husband is better suited to the orthodontic beat than I am. He worries just as much as I do about these things, but he doesn't show it. (As I type this, my husband is either pretending to read magazines in the waiting room at the orthodontist's office, waiting for news on how our son is doing; or he's been called in to provide on-the-spot cheerleading and reassurance.)

My husband and my 12 year old have another tough mission ahead of them in the next few weeks: Operation Tooth Extraction. They've been through it together in the past; so I know they can do it again. And as for me? I'll be sitting across town, appreciating the fact that I was wise enough to pick a man who has the right stuff (the ability to be a great dental parent, among other things); and loving the fact that my 12 year old and his dad have always had a super-special bond.

It goes back to the very beginning, in the moments after my son was born. I had sustained a bad tear while giving birth and the midwives were busy attending to me, so my husband held our newborn baby boy for the longest time. I remember my husband speaking softly to him and welcoming him to our family; telling him about his brothers and his sister. This pregnancy (after my previous baby's stillbirth the year before) had been the longest 41 ½ weeks of my life. But now this baby was here, safe, cradled in my husband's arms.

Suddenly I felt safer, too - and ready to face the future as a family.

Comments

[Maggie]

Such a wonderful post. Thanks so much for sharing Ann. A good father and partner is one of life's greatest gifts! We are blessed.

[Ann Douglas]

Thanks for your comment, Maggie. My husband thought this was one of the sappiest things I've ever written, but it needed to be said nonetheless. (Sometimes you've got to err on the side of sappiness, right?) :-)