Swedish Meatballs: Are Saab’s new caretakers at Spyker in trouble? Again?

As we wait to hear about the supposed 20-or-so Canadian dealers who are ready, willing, and able to start selling and servicing Saabs again, it looks like the Swedish automaker’s new parents at Dutch super car maker Spyker are continuing right where former owner Government Motors left off: losing money.

Reuters is saying Spyker Cars NV may have been too optimistic on Saab's earlier sales goals. Shocking, I know. The global sales goal for Saab has been reduced to 45,000 this year, down from a previous target of 50,000. Spyker is now forecasting 2011 Saab sales at 80,000, down from 100,000 before, but it kept a long-term sales goal of 120,000 a year.

Not that the Saabistas want to hear this, but Spyker has never made a profit. Just last year, they lost $25.81 million, on sales of only $8.85 million. I’m no Bernie Madoff. But that doesn’t look very good. And now a report coming from Automobilwoche says Spyker has until the end of this week to file for bankruptcy or find new investors. And that’s not good news for the new products Saab needs to get into showrooms sooner than later.

For instance, BMW wanted to deliver engines for the Mexican-made 9-4X crossover and maybe the 9-3 compact. But that deal is stone cold now. And Spyker has been talking about launching a premium subcompact 9-2 model, and then enter it in the World Rally Championship. But before that can happen, the 9-2 needs to move beyond speculative concept drawings.

The big problem is that the cost of the 9-2 wasn't included in the turnaround plan Saab presented to its current investors and the Swedish government. So Saab needs to find another automaker that will supply a platform it can rebody.

Spyker was going to hook up with BMW’s next-gen Mini platform for its new 9-2 premium subcompact, but now Automotive News is saying Spyker head Victor Muller is chatting with three automakers (BMW included) for help with the 9-2.

Of course, being able to pay another automaker for the 9-2 platform may be a bit of  sticking issue as Muller takes his Saab cap in hand.

Do you think Saab will remerge as a real global player again?

Do you think enough Canadians even want the Swedish brand to return to our shores?

[Sources: Automobilwoche, Automotive News, Reuters]

The Troubles with Toyotas: The silver lining behind the latest massive recall

Ho-hum. Another—the sixteenth this year—Toyota vehicle recall. This time for the bland-yet-popular, Canadian-made Corolla and Matrix models. If you happen to work for Toyota, at the corporate or dealership levels, this is yet another left-right jab to your company’s image. No doubt. And as Tony Alphen’s piece reads, “…the continuing negative publicity over the recalls and questions about the company’s longstanding reputation for quality and durability is a key reason why sales have slipped here this year while most rivals are recovering the recession.”

Historically, Toyota’s reputation for reliably (at the sake of styling, quality, and driving appeal) has kept its used car residual values at a higher-than-average value. But not any longer. The spate of recalls this past year has revealed what Toyota really is: Just another profits-first automaker, but with boring cars.

However this latest recall isn’t bad news for everyone. Especially if you’re in the market for a used compact car. If you’re in that group, and want to take advantage of a rare opportunity to get a leg up on a Toyota dealer, go in this weekend and shop for a used Corolla/Matrix in the 2005-2008 model years that fall under the latest recall. And make sure you bring in a copy of Alphen’s recall piece from today’s Star, just for added leverage.

Recalls aside, fundamentally, these cars are still good, basic pieces of transportation. Although they do drive like your dishwasher. And the interior plastics will remind you of your kid’s Lego. And their bland styling will make it difficult to find them in a crowded mall parking lot. But hey, at least they get descent gas mileage, there’s plenty of them on the used market, and the Matrix’s hatchback configuration means it can be a used as the sole ride for most one-car-only families.

And—most importantly for shoppers—the Corolla and Matrix will (or should) be on sale at a price that relates to their true value.

 

 

Ten Worst First Date Cars

Those in the dating world are all too familiar with the old axiom, you can’t make a first impression twice. So while what you wear and how good your breath smells may be high on the to-do- list for that all-too-crucial First Date, the car you pull up in will also leave a lasting initial impression.

I can’t help you with your personal hygiene. But I can help your choice for a first date ride. If you want to make it on the dating playing field, let alone get to first-, second-, or third-base, do not pull up in front of your First Date’s home in one of these 10 lust killers:

10. 2010 BMW X6 Sports Activity Coupe Optimism is an important attitude to have in the dating world. Otherwise, you’d probably never leave your abode. But over-optimism can be deadly, too. And nothing screams “dirty weekend” to your First Date like BMW’s $65,700 - $99,900 X6.

Essentially a four-seat version of the more practical X5 SUV, the X6 was designed for those who only need occasional rear seating ,and enough cargo space for a pair of overnight bags—nudge, nudge, wink, wink…

9. 2011 Infiniti QX56 No one can account for taste. But showing up in the all-new-for-2011 $73,000 QX56 SUV would be the equivalent to a man wearing a plaid suit and white shoes; Rodney Dangerfield in the movie Caddyshack dressed better than the new Infiniti.

While the second-generation 2004 – 2010 QX didn’t win any automotive beauty contests, the new QX has reached new depths in tasteless styling. Based on Nissan’s foreign market Patrol, Infiniti designers have heavy-handedly forced styling cues from their sexy Essence show car onto the boxy Patrol's shape. The results? I’ll let you decide.

8. 2010 Mitsubishi Lancer Evolution Unless your First Date is a former World Rally Championship participant, showing up in Mitsubishi’s $41,998 - $51,798 Lancer Evolution is only evidence of your aggressive nature, or your obsession with the Fast and Furious flicks.

Sure, you could spin the Evo’s sophisticated all-wheel-drive system as a “road safety” feature. But more than likely, after you’ve performed your first hand-brake turn while pulling into the local multiplex, your First Date will be asking for bus fare home.

7. 2010 Acura CSX I’ve been told sincerity is the key on these First Date adventures. Be honest—flaws and all—and (allegedly) the person you’re meeting for the first time will be appreciative. With that in mind, avoid arriving in Acura’s $27,490 - $29,990 CSX, one of the most pretentious cars you can buy.

A badge-engineered Honda Civic (the CSX is made in the same Alliston, Ontario plant), there’s little the Acura compact sedan offers that a well-equipped Civic EXL doesn’t for $22,680. Even if you try to explain to your First Date why you spent an extra $5k for the Acura badge, and not on a nicer bottle of wine, it’ll be tough to play down the inevitable “Pretentious Git” label coming your way.

6. 2010 Volkswagen Eos Unless you want to communicate to your First Date that you're suffering through a harrowing identity crisis, I’d take a pass on VW’s $36,575 - $44,575 Eos, a car trying to decide if it wants to be a coupe, a convertible, or both.

A perennial Chick Car winner since its debut in 2006, the Eos doesn’t work as a First Date car for either sex. If you’re a male looking for a female, you'd better be comfortable in your own sexuality. If you’re a female seeking a male, you better be prepared to defend the chick flick you’ve probably already suggested as the evening’s fare.

5. 2010 Hyundai Accent Hatchback

Although Hyundai Canada markets the Accent hatch (at $10,599 - $15,649, one of the least expensive new cars you can buy in Canada), as a “Smart” decision, you might as well get large vinyl letters and spell out the word C-H-E-A-P before you arrive for your First Date.

4. 2010 Smart ForTwo You may think the $14,990 - $21,250 ForTwo coupe and convertible would be fine First Date rides. Both work well as city cars. And unlike some of the other vehicles mentioned here, with only two seats, the Smart doesn’t telegraph your desire to repopulate the planet.

But because you and your First Date are literally elbow-to-elbow in the Smart’s tight interior, the intimate environment poses potential problems. Riding in the Smart is like watching close-ups of each other on a big screen HDTV. Your zits, hanging nose hairs, and unplucked eyebrows are all on display. Hey, you’ve been warned.

3. 2011 Toyota Sienna I’m picking the new-for-2011 $27,900 - $49,100 Sienna, mainly because it represents the cutting edge in the stagnant minivan genre. But for my purposes, any minivan is a First Date disaster.

Want to give your First Date the impression that you’re tied down with responsibilities? That you’ve just come out of a recent divorce? Or that you’re hoping your date goes so well that the two of you can populate all eight seats of the Sienna with your offspring? Er, thought not.

2. 2010 Buick Lucerne Unless you’re dating octogenarian actress Betty White, the $33,095 - $52,315 Lucerne creates two potential First Date conundrums.

First, the decrepit Buick says you’re probably old enough to be your date’s grandparent. Or perhaps, arriving in the Lucerne suggests that you’re still living with your grandparents, “borrowing” their set of wheels while they’re at bingo. Either way, good luck with the Lucerne.

1. 2010 Lexus HS250h Hybrid Don’t beat yourself up if you haven’t heard of the $39,900 - $48,750 HS250h. As the confusing blend of a European Toyota compact sedan (with less rear legroom than a half-the-price Corolla), powered by an almost-$10,000-cheaper Camry Hybrid powertrain, and awkward looks handed down from the Lexus RX SUV, the HS 250h has been a slow seller since its introduction last year.

Now unless your First Date is an auto industry analyst, who is interested in the reasoning why Toyota would foist such a strange car on the market, you’ll be spending your evening explaining the Whys and Hows of your purchase, instead of the deep glow of your First Date's deep blue eyes.

 

UPDATED: Canadians have spoken, hybrids really are a dumb buy

Honda Canada replied to the Civic Hybrid and Insight hullabalu: "There has been a rumour circulating this week about Honda Canada no longer selling the Honda Insight or Civic Hybrid. Please note that it is just that—a rumour. Honda Canada will listen to the voice of our customers and will bring the products they want. If there is market demand for Insight and Civic Hybrid, we will bring the appropriate supply. Honda dealers currently have more than 6 months supply of these models, so we will monitor demand and order more when demand is there. That said, Honda Canada is planning to offer both Insight and Civic Hybrid as 2011 model-year units, and we have no plans to discontinue either model."

So there you go. - JL

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It’s taken a few years. But it looks like Canadian new car buyers are coming to their senses about the lack of value in gasoline-electric hybrids."

Montreal’s LaPresse is reporting that Honda Canada will be dropping two-thirds of its hybrid lineup. Not that anyone will notice, but allegedly, the Civic Hybrid and the much-hyped Insight will be leaving showrooms, just as its new CR-Zed sports coupe arrives.

"Our dealers do not keep any of these models [Insight and Civic hybrid] in stock and the customer who wants to buy one should place an order and wait for the car be delivered to him," Nadia Mereb, Honda’s Québec media relations person told the Montreal newspaper.

Officially, there wasn’t a 2010 model year for the hybrid Civic. It’s lack of popularity caused Honda Canada to continue to sell leftover 2009 models. Of the over 30,000 Civics sold in Canada in the fist half of 2010, only about 600 were hybrids. The Insight—Honda’s half-hearted response to Toyota’s Prius—has been even more of an unmitigated disaster. Only about 750 Canadians have bought an Insight this year. A little off the projected 10,000-per-year numbers Honda Canada had hoped for, eh?

Of course, Honda isn’t the only one finding out that hybrids aren’t fooling all of the people, all of the time. I expect Toyota premium brand Lexus’ HS 250h will soon suffer the same as the just-canned Honda hybrids.

Originally priced in the $40,000 and $50,000 range, rare is the buyer that has bought into the HS’s—er—interesting value proposition. And the market has spoken.

Last weekend in the Wheels print section, Lexus Canada was advertising $7,000 in discounts and incentives on the HS 250h, bringing it’s base price down to $34,980. Hey, don’t worry. There's no need to ruch down to your local Lexus dealer. The old, “Hurry! They’re going fast!” tagline doesn’t apply here.

So, obviously, Canadians have wisened up to the questionable value proposition of hybrids. And, obviously, they’re too many hybrids for the market. So which hybrid do you think should be the next to walk the plank?

[Sources: Lexus Canada, La Presse]

Speaking of old lemons…

SALINAS, Calif. - In total contrast to the multi-zillion-dollar collector and race cars I saw at the Quail Lodge, Monterey vintage races and Pebble Beach concours last weekend, a group of us managed to sneak away to Toro Regional Park, home of the second annual Concours d'LeMons.

If you don’t already know, the “Concours” is an offshoot of the part old crappy racecar, part art car amateur endurance racing series called the 24 Hours of LeMons.

If you’re a big fan of crappy, old cars (i.e. Pintos, Pacers, etc.), with a dash of irreverence, enjoy…

 

Believe it or not, this is allegedly the concept Hal Sperlich's Ford bosses at the time rejected. Sperlich took his idea of a garage-able "mini" van to his new bosses at Chrysler, and as they say, the rest is history.

Unsavoury at any speed...

This 1982 Peugeot 505 is just one of the reasons the French automaker dares not enter the North American market. Agian. Ever.

This 1971 Wolseley 16/60 makes me want to close my eyes and think of the Queen.

The thirst quenching 1959 Austin Healey Sprite Mk I .

This 1988 Daihatsu is a Charade. No. Lirerally.

From the new owners of the Chrysler Corp.: 1982 Alfa Romeo GTV-6.

Plenty of Pacers. Even a Woody wagon. But wha? No Matador?

A 1971 Mercedes-Benz 230: German engineering arrogance at its slowest.

Just adding fuel to the fire, this Ford Pinto Wagon owner has added a turbo. Oh yeah.

Nope. Smart hasn't gone and made a minivan. This VW mini-mini-minivan was created from the leftover bits of a previous extended-Microbus project.

It's a Trabant. Nuff said.

Imagine if GM designers had blessed their Pontiac Aztek with Chrysler's Stow 'N Go seats? Imagine!

Why I hate driving (some) Old Fart cars

MONTEREY, Calif. – Cars as art? No problem. I can appreciate the past as rolling sculpture as well as anyone else. I never really understood the fascination with driving old cars, though, at least for the cars I’ve owned or driven in the past. They’ve always been more fragile, unreliable, slower, or handle like a bag of squirrels compared to any modern car.

Beyond the nostalgia associated with Old Fart clunkers—“I first got (fill in the blank) in that car!”—the whole idea of driving something before I even breathed on this planet seems to go against the basic foundation of our race, the need to move forward, progress. I don’t wash my clothes on a rock in a stream, have woolly mammoth shirts in my wardrobe, or cook my dinner on an open fire.

But hey, that’s just me…

So with an open mind, I accepted an invitation from Porsche Canada to drive two of its museum pieces it brought down here to sunny Carmel Valley, part of the weeklong car orgy that will culminate tomorrow with the Concours D’Elegance on the 18th hole at the famed Pebble Beach golf course.

Ho, fricken, hum. As you may know: I don’t do “old cars.” So the idea of driving a couple of “Before 911” Porsche 356s (when the keys of a brand new 911 GT3 were also on hand) was not high on my priority list. But with time to spare, why not? If only to prove that old cars are crap. After a 100 km round trip down and back to Big Sur along California’s Hwy 1, though, in both a 1962 356 convertible and coupe, allow me to edit my opinion to: “I hate driving Old Fart cars that aren’t from the Porsche Museum.”

The first old Porsche I drove was a silver 1960 356B 2000 GS Carrera GT (right). Like a modern 911 GT3 (which I did eventually get my seat time in), it was built to let customers go to the track.

In the context of its day, the 2000 GS Carrera GT was a Gemini space ship: i.e. cutting edge. With the latest in lightweight technology, circa 1960 (aluminum body panels, additional chassis welds for increased stiffness, plexi side windows, lightweight aluminum seat shells and a wooden steering wheel) this Mad Men era sports car also has a race-tuned 2.0-litre flat-four sporting 175 hp.

Yes. There are no seat belts, Bluetooth, or dual-zone climate control. But all of the car’s important “driving” parts (steering, handling, ride quality, tightness, build quality) were surprisingly modern.

Okay. The GS Carrera GT's fearsome blats from its racing exhaust would wake yours and the next-town-over’s neighbours. But the direct, tactile feel from all its oily bits makes a new Cayman S feel anodyne.

The second old Porsche I got the chance to pilot, a red ’62 356B Carrera 2 Cabriolet (left), was just as surprising, but in another way.

The Carrera 2 was the most powerful 356 Cabriolet ever (the “2” indicated the displacement in litres of the 130 hp flat-four.) Naught to 100 km/h took 9.4 seconds, a number Porsche claims, “Before 1962, only cars with twice the engine displacement could accomplish the feat.”

Compared to the race bred 2000 GS Carrera GT, the Carrera 2 Cabriolet felt like a Cadillac. Or more accurately, a modern MX-5. Quiet, comfortable, yet with tons of feedback from all of its controls, I would have no problems driving this little red rocket on a daily summer basis. Heck, this Old Fart even had an AM/FM radio.

I still think old cars are crap. Just the ones without a Porsche badge on their hoods.

Driving in P.E.I.: Great roads, shame about the drivers

Just got back from a couple of week’s en famille on Prince Edward Island. Let’s just say, that as a family vacation spot, it’s hard to beat Canada’s smallest province.

The waters of the beaches of the North Shore near where we were hunkered down, just east of Cavendish, were remarkably warm. Thank you global warming. And with a five-and-three-quarter-year-old Anne of Green Gables fan in tow, between the Upper Canada Village-style Avonlea, and the countless former stomping grounds of Anne’s creator, Lucy Maud Montgomery, to explore, nary a day went by were we weren’t happily exhausted by the end of each evening.

Now, the Island’s road system is actually pretty good. It’s a spider’s web network of paved two-laners that makes it easy to get from Point A to Point B fairly efficiently. And in between, the topography is gorgeous. If you’re not looking at a sandy dune beach, you’re looking at lush, fertile fields of the province's trademark produce, potatoes. But as a place to get anywhere quickly, or without an anxious moment, driving—or specifically, the drivers—on P.E.I. leave(s) a lot to be desired.

Let’s start with the tourists. Or as anyone born east of Truro says, the tore-ists.

As you may have guessed, P.E.I. is chock-a-block with those who think driving an RV will save them money, driving in that aching slow, halting, and hesitant, I-know-the-campground-is-around-here-somewhere-style, while ignoring the long line of drivers behind them, the ones who actually have a clue where they are going.

But it’s just not the tore-ists that drive like the road kill foxes that litter P.E.I. The locals have their own brand of what they call “driving,” with three signature moves that if you ever venture on the Island you need to heed.

First, whereas the rest of us treat posted speed limits it as a starting point, P.E.I. is one of the few places on the planet where the speeding limit is just that—the limit. So while the rest of the world applies 80 km/h into 100 km/h, most Islanders rarely waver over the posted speeds.

Second is a phenomenon I’ve never experienced anywhere else: Drivers exiting laneways, but waiting until the last second to do so. They either get in your lane ahead of you (obeying the speed limit—argh!!!) or merrily wave as they cut you off heading in the opposite direction.

Double-arghh!!

As explained to me by an uncle, who lives here back in Ontario during the winter, but summers near Summerside, on the Northumberland Strait side of the Island, this is caused for good reason.

“Well, they want to see who’s coming down the road, to see if they know them or not.”

Riiight…

The third signature P.E.I. driver move is the last second turn signal. Typically, a car ahead, approaching a corner, will slow down. But wait…wait…wait…there it is, a signal, about half way through the turn. Very helpful, indeed.

And it's just not yours truly who feels this way about P.E.I. drivers.

I have a good friend who’s a native Islander. Even he admits that the driving habits of the locals and visitors can be unnerving. Having traveled the world as a marketing executive for the past three decades, he says there are two places you don’t want to drive on this globe, Cairo, Egypt, and Prince Edward Island.

So go to P.E.I. for the beaches, the friendly hospitality and the fresh seafood.

But in regards to driving on the Island, all I can say is, great roads, shame about the drivers.