(NOTE: One more casualty of last week's computer troubles, I'm reposting this one that never made it, just so you know)
Chelsea's Joe Cole has his own flash website and in the field of milquetoast, say-nothing pro athletes' websites it's about as bland as it gets. Just check out this Jan. 5 diary entry previewing the Blues' FA Cup match with (Second Division, or as it's known now in the world of England pro footiespeak, League One) Huddersfield:
Everyone wants to win the FA Cup. Scunthorpe gave us a bit of a scare last season and we know this will be another tough game.
So I'm wondering, if and when he gets around to it after digesting how Chelsea handed the mighty Terriers, how little Joe will explain away this story in this morning's Sun tabloid, which has even been picked up on this side of the Atlantic by Deadspin. Seems Cole tried to pinch someone else's bird, and everything went off:
They were chatting closely when another guest butted in. A source said: “It all went off. It was late and everyone had downed a few drinks. Joe and Keeley were getting on well but another admirer copped the right hump about it.
“He went ballistic and had Joe for breakfast.”
I'm not sure what "copping the right hump" is all about (as you probably guessed, "pinching someone else's bird" is about as far as I go in adopting the vernacular), and who knows how much of this is true. Here's the link (NSFW, just so you know) from the Sun.
Oh, and while we're on the topic of footie and frolickin', this from GQ's "20 Reasons to be Cheerful about 2006":
As hosts of this summer's World Cup, the Germans are encouraging soccer hooligans to make love not war.
Artemis, a multimillion-euro new "pleasure dome" (or, as we say on this side of the Atlantic, "whorehouse"), is located just a ripped-out-seat's throw from Berlin's Olympic Stadium, and will lure sports enthusiasts with saunas, cinemas, a Turkish bath, and up to 100 girls offering far more action off the field than you're likely to see on it (all perfectly legal in liberated Deutschland).
POSTSCRIPT: From the same article, and apologies if this is old news to you, but it's the first I've heard of it:
Ever find yourself thinking that basketball isn't half as much fun to watch as it used to be? Well, you're right, and the proof is about to become available. The NBA is in the midst of digitizing virtually every game ever played, which will make it possible for computers to search and compile specific moments from specific games. To use an inevitable example, you'll eventually be able to download all shots taken by Michael Jordan with less than a minute left in a game when the Bulls were behind. (Case in point: this legendary game-winner against Cleveland in the '89 play-offs.) The whole thing won't happen overnight, but the league expects to make some footage available to fans shortly via its web site.
Cool. How long until we'll be able to download Joe Cole's escapade at Artemis, and the like? Not long, I reckon. I'll just have to keep checking Joe's website. On second thought, maybe not.