If you can't spot a Ford Crown Vicky, all in black, massive tires, cheap hub caps, big anti-roll bar hanging down below the differential, well, you deserve to get caught.
Even the big ol' Chevy Tahoe SUVs - hardly the environmentally-friendly police vehicle of choice - is pretty easy to spot. Again, all black, but with no chrome trim like most of these behemoths sport.
Shouldn't be a problem.
But on Labour Day weekend, I saw a new twist - a beige O. P. P. Tahoe.
BEIGE? What kind of colour is that for a police car?
Sure to strike fear into the hearts of the pursued?
But you do have to watch for these guys.
Unless/until you get close enough to see that the side marker lights are blue and/or red.
And by then, it's probably too late.
If only what these officers are doing - basically, preventing you from getting where you want to go on time - had any real benefit.
Now, if they'd just tie big ol' mattresses onto the right side of these things, and use them to shove left- and middle-lane bandits into the right lane where they belong, then we'd be getting somewhere.
Literally and figuratively.
The perps would learn a lesson, without actually having to be pulled over. No fuss, no muss.
A much larger number of recalcitrant citizens would hereby be persuaded into proper behaviour.
And no further clogging up of our court system.
In-car video cameras could record each 'bust' (more like a push) so the officer would get the same credit as he/she would for an actual traffic ticket.
Maybe double, because this really WOULD make our roads safer and more efficient.
Win win win win, sez I.
Hey - I can dream, can't I?