Jim Kenzie's The Driver's Seat

Completely Pointless Driving Advice from Gray Power

Have you heard those radio ads for “Completely Biased Car Advice” from Subaru?

Kinda cute.

But have you heard those radio ads for “Completely Pointless Driving Advice” from Gray Power Insurance?

Scary.

OK, so I do qualify for Gray Power on the hair colour count.

And no, contrary to that scurrilous comment herein a few weeks ago, I don't dawdle in the left lane with my turn signal (and a hat) on. After all, the Ontario government built the Jim-Only lane for me, and the police departments appear to enforce my exclusive thereof, so why wouldn't I use it?

And the only hat I wear in a car (other than in a convertible - gotta watch out for that sun) always has a Snell sticker in it.

(For those that don't get that reference, that's a racing helmet. Get your own and meet me at the track...).

But I digress.

These Gray Power ads purport to reward 'good' drivers like 'Stewie' - they even wrote a little ditty about him - who always comes to a full stop at every Stop sign.

I guess Gray Power doesn't insure the people who rear-end each other because Stewie - and Stewie alone - came to that complete stop.

The fact is, every Stop sign is an admission of failure to design the intersection properly. Actually, the 'Stops' should all be roundabouts, again like most of the intersections in the UK, but one step at a time...

At the very least, virtually every Stop sign should be a Yield sign which, in the absence of a roundabout, is what they typically use in the UK. The vast majority of even our drivers treat Stop signs as Yield signs anyway.

Hence, Stewie is probably gonna get rear-ended on a regular basis.

For safety, traffic flow management, reduced fuel consumption and lower emissions - never mind everyone getting home sooner - a Yield is what we need.

Yeah yeah, I know what the law says. It's not the only place where, in the words popularized but surely predating Charles Dickens, “The Law is an Ass''.

And it's still down to the traffic planners who do have the option of installing Yield signs instead of Stop signs where they would be more appropriate,

Which is almost everywhere.

Then there's the ad which extols 'Bob' for always checking his blind spots before changing lanes.

Come on, Bob. Open your mind, open your eyes, get with the program.

Do you drive like the young woman I saw in an Acura EL on Bayview the other day who must have driven half the length of a football field looking over her left shoulder, presumably checking her 'blind spot'?

Which, as regular readers know, simply does not exist: crank those side-view mirrors out farther, and presto - no more blind spots.

This young woman definitely would not qualify under the 'over-50' criterion for Gray Power Insurance; just as well, because you wouldn't want her on your roster under any circumstances.

Good for you Gray Power to try and use your platform to communicate driving tips to the general public.

But you've got to make them accurate and useful, not dangerous.

As in:

- Stewie, always back into your parking space so it's safer when you pull out again;

- Bob, learn how to adjust your mirrors correctly;

- everyone, turn on all your lights, all the time, because Daytime Running Lights typically don't illuminate the taillights, and in most of our driving they're more important than the fronts.

Have your copywriters give me a call. I've got enough driving tips for ten years worth of ads.

 

Remembering Tom Hnatiw - September 18

Not that his legion of friends and fans will ever forget him.

But a get-together is being planned for all of us to hoist a Perrier or two in his memory, and to repeat various stories - tall or otherwise - about this great guy.

Trying to find a time when as many of his closest compadres as possible could all make it was tough, what with everyone's schedule being so crowded, but we've settled on Tuesday evening, September 18.

Venue TBA; keep watching this space and we'll update when we know for sure.

Given the size of that legion, we might have to rent the Rogers Centre.

Please pass this information on to any of your friends or networks.

Thank you.

 

Miscellaneous Observations - One of a Series

Saw a "Ford for Mayor" bumper sticker on a Pontiac Aztek yesterday.

I'm jes' sayin'...

Tom Hnatiw's passing - update

For the many who have asked, Tom's family - Debbie, his wife for 23 years, and his sons Nick and Wyatt - have said that the cause of death was complications from kidney disease.

A private family gathering will be held at a later date.

Tom had asked that donations in his memory may be made to the scholarship fund of the May Court Club of Oakville.

Alternatively, you could visit the web site of his company Internal Combustion Group, where you can fill out a donation form directly.

Tom was a wonderful guy; we will not see his like again...

[NOTE: I just tried to access that donation form (above), and while it appears you should be able to fill the form in on-line, it doesn't seem to work, at least not on my two computers. Perhaps you must print the form out, fill it in and mail it with your donation. As soon as I find out more, I will let you know...]

 

Tom Hnatiw

Tom Hnatiw, the very definition of a 'Car Guy', has passed away.

I have very few details at this point - I'll update as more information becomes available.

Perhaps the best way for you all to stay in touch with respect to memorial services would be at the web site of his company, Internal Combustion Group.

In addition to being the nicest guy you ever met, Tom had an amazing voice. Being a radio announcer was what he dreamed of growing up in Dauphin Manitoba.

He lived his dream, and then some.

Even his outgoing telephone voice mail message sounded like a K-TEL commercial.

He also had a terrific singing voice, and sang with my band on occasion.

Tom leaves his wife Debbie and two young sons.

We will all miss him.

 

Shelby GT500

Somebody had to come to Road Atlanta to thrash the 2013 662-horsepower Shelby GT500 around the fabled Road Atlanta race track.

It was my turn to take one for the team.

It was especially poignant doing this one week to the day after Carroll Shelby went to that Big Pit Stop in the Sky.

Carroll Shelby

As every car enthusiast knows by now, Carroll Shelby passed away last Thursday.

 

We're saddened if not entirely shocked; after all, Carroll was 89 years old - a good innings by any reckoning - and lived his entire life under the constant threat of a weak heart.

 

Biologically, at least - he was one of the longest-surviving heart transplants, and also had a donated kidney from his son.

 

But there was never anything lacking in his metaphorical heart.

 

His racing and car-building exploits are well-known; I'll just add a couple of personal anecdotes.

 

Two years ago, local vintage car guru Richard Pickering organized what we think was the largest collection of Shelby vehicles ever assembled under one roof. Shelby himself was flown up from his California home, and several of his long-standing colleagues and buddies, including racer/driving instructor Bob Bondurant and journalist David E. Davis Jr., also attended.

 

I don't know if anyone had ever seen Shelby in tears before, but he was at that event - it was an unforgettable evening.

 

Many more years ago than I can possibly remember but it must have been early- to mid-1980s, Chrysler brought Shelby to the Media Preview for their new model-year line-up, to give journalists rides around the Chelsea Michigan proving grounds in his Dodge Shelby Charger.

 

As I strapped myself in for my turn, I complimented Shelby on the fact that his version of the Charger was one of the first cars to have dual retractable cup holders.

 

“Shoot,” said Shelby approximately, “all a man needs in a car is a back seat for his [fuddle-duddling], a rack for his rifle, and a place to put his coffee and beer!”

 

That's product planning in a nutshell...

 

A bit later in our drive, we passed a Chrysler test driver whose job was simply to put development miles on a Plymouth TC3. Shelby glanced in the mirror and saw that the Plymouth driver had obviously seen who was driving the Charger, and had picked up his pace.

 

Shelby grinned at me. “Looks like he wants to play!” (Wish I could type in a Texas accent...).

 

Now, on the back half of the Chelsea circuit is a series of whoop-de-doos - three short sharp hills. If you wonder where Car and Driver magazine gets those cover shots with the car way up in the air, wonder no more.

 

Shelby gunned the car up the first one, flying off the crest, not touching the back side of the hill at all as it returned from near-orbit.

 

The car slammed into the pavement at the bottom of that first hill, then flew off the top of the second one.

 

WHAM - we landed again.

 

The third hill has a little right-hand kink, right at the crest. Shelby took to the gravel shoulder before launching, so that when we landed, we were still on the pavement.

 

As the car settled down, he looked in the mirror again, grinned again, and said to me, “Looks like he don't wanna play no more!”

 

The poor Plymouth guy had probably got out of his car and walked back to the pits, never to get behind a wheel again.

 

Rest in Peace, Carroll. We will never see your like again.

 

Will They Never Learn?

One tidbit that escaped my attention at the recent New York Auto Show was a display of humankind's never-ending optimism.

Or stupidity, depending on your perspective.

Because if there's a way to make a horrible car even worse, someone will find a way.

Ladies and Gentlemen, thanks to an Alert Reader (Dave Barry isn't the only one) may I present:

The DeLorean Electric.

The original DeLorean should have been called 'Hubris' - an awful car which ended in a variety of disasters, for investors, for employees of the Irish factory, and of course for Mr. DeLorean himself.

Not to mention for the 9,000-odd people who were saddled with these pieces of junk.

But like owners of Edsels who've been trying to convince the world for over five decades that their cars are valuable simply because they are rare - conveniently forgetting that there are a million very good reasons why they were rare to begin with - DeLorean owners have convinced themselves that they're on to something.

Folks: when they make a comedy movie franchise - not just a movie; a FRANCHISE! - based on your car, that should be a clue.

Stephen Wynne - and no, that's not the Las Vegas Steve Wynn-without-an-e - is a Liverpool-native-now-Texas-based mechanic who repairs and restores DeLoreans. He has ended up with a large collection of new-old-stock and used parts, and has also acquired the rights to the corporate name.

He decided that what the DeLorean needed was an electric powertrain.

The 400 volt AC induction motor produces some 260 horsepower, which is claimed to shove the car from rest to 100 km/h in about five seconds, with a top end of 200 km/h.

Much more than the 88 mph (141 km/h) Marty McFly and Doc Brown needed to go Back to the Future.

The battery can recharge in just 3.5 hours.

Oh wait - you don't have 240-volt / 70 amp service at your house?

Then it'd be more like 14 hours.

For a 160 km range.

Sure, Steve.

Wynne says he chose the particular battery supplier because of its name.

Flux Power.

I wouldn't even dare to make that up.

Not quite 'Flux Capacitor', but close enough. (Thank you again, Alert Reader.)

Wynne says he'll have 70 of these cars available in 2013, for $95,000 (US) a pop.

With the level of self-delusion prevalent amongst DeLorean owners, he might just sell some.

But Steve, fair warning: watch out for the Feds trying that ol' "cocaine bust entrapment" gambit.

Maybe I'll buy one myself and see if I can go back to 1955.

Then I could be the one who discovers 'Johnny B. Goode.'

Makes as much sense as an electric DeLorean...

 

High School Students Fight Distracted Driving

SMARTRISK is a terrific non-profit organization whose purpose is to encourage people (largely but not exclusively young people) to prevent injury by smart thinking and intelligent risk management.

 

SMARTRISK was started some two decades ago by Dr. Robert Conn, a paediatric heart surgeon whose job had largely evolved into taking the hearts out of dead teenagers and sticking them into the chests of fat old men.

 

Even as I get older and fatter, I can't help but agree with Dr. Conn who realized he could save more lives - certainly more 'person-years' - if he could find a way to keep the young people from dying in the first place.

 

He learned that trauma - most significantly, car crashes - was the major cause of premature death for Canadians.

 

So he quit what must have been a six-figure gig to start SMARTRISK. It has developed a wide range of educational and awareness programs to further its goals.

 

This wasn't some sort of retirement project either; Dr. Conn was only 37 years old when he started SMARTRISK.

 

It's hard not to be impressed by a young guy who gives up such a lucrative career to try and save the lives of my kids - and yours.

 

Which is why I donate half of the proceeds of my annual car photography calendar to SMARTRISK.

 

(Yes, it is a bit late in the year to buy a calendar, but I'll give you a discount - click HERE to visit my web site.

 

Dr. Conn only figured to run SMARTRISK for ten years or so; he retired a couple of years ago after seventeen years at the helm. The organization is now in the capable hands of Dr. Phil Groff.

 

One of SMARTRISK's latest programs is called “Is It Worth It?” With support from the State Farm Youth Advisory Board - State Farm Insurance is a major sponsor of SMARTRISK - and building on an idea developed by students at Northern Secondary School in Toronto and Leo Hayes High School in Fredericton New Brunswick, high school students were invited to produce Public Service Announcements - short videos - emphasizing the dangers of distracted driving.

 

Whether texting, calling on a cell phone, eating, putting on make-up, even playing music too loud or having too many people in the car, can seriously impair the driver's ability to focus on the issue at hand - namely, driving.

 

Over 60 videos were received, many of them showing considerable degrees of creativity and imagination.

 

A committee of ten “celebrities and driving experts”, according to the organizers (not sure which category they thought I fell into, but I was one of the jurors) was charged with evaluating the submissions, with the criteria being clear and accurate delivery of content, creativity and originality, use of positive messaging, strength of impact, and technical quality of the PSA.

 

The original plan was to narrow the field down to ten videos, which would then be judged by you, the viewing public.

 

But there were too many good entries, too many ties to break, so the finalist group was enlarged to fifteen.

 

Click HERE to visit the "Is It Worth It" web site  to view these finalists, and to cast your vote. You have the entire month of April to vote. Voting rules are listed on the site.

 

Be prepared to be impressed by the passion and imagination of Canada's high school students.

 

Also, to learn more about SMARTRISK, click HERE.

 

Mr. Toyoda's Emotional Speech at the Tokyo Motor Show

I guarantee you've never heard a Japanese car company executive, especially one from such a conservative company as Toyota, get as emotional in public as president and CEO Akio Toyoda did to kick off his company's Press Conference at the Tokyo Motor Show.

The clip is over six minutes long, but I think you should watch it all - here.

And yes, the family name and the company name are not spelled the same.