Four vacation questions before the Leafs return tomorrow

It's hard to believe this Leafs vacation is nearly over. My God, time flies when you're not hurling profanities at your TV.

My body went into blue-and-white withdrawal sometime on Day 3. My wife and I were strolling through the lobby at Serenity Hotel in the balmy Republic of No More Losing. She was yammering on about beta-Carotene or new bunk beds for the kids – the memory is hazy – when my right eye started twitching uncontrollably.

"Are you okay?" she asked, as I clutched my face with one hand and braced myself against a marble pillar with the other.

"I'm fine," I said, trying not to blackout. "But it's been 72 hours since I've watched someone giveaway the puck or shoot high and wide on a breakaway. It's hard."

On Day 5, after dining on charred root vegetables and fried tilapia, we walked along the beach at night.

"Isn't this wonderful?" my wife asked, twirling in the sand and grabbing my hand with a coquettish grin.

"I don't really see how they're going to make the playoffs – maybe not even next year," I replied, as palm fronds swayed gently under a quarter moon.

"What?" she hissed, throwing down my hand. "We're on vacation from the Leafs! You promised!"

"Do you think Reimer is for real?" I asked. "I do. How much can the MacArthur line really be expected to do all by itself? How do we get Kessel to focus more so these weird, extended slumps eventually disappear? The poor bastard was even invisible at the All-Star game."

"I hate you!" my wife screamed.

"Listen to me," I said, whispering and grabbing her shoulders. "I feel queasy. My mouth is dry. Okay? I just need five minutes of your time. Help me answer four questions before the Leafs return on Tuesday."

"I feel sorry for you," she said. "I really do."

"One, the Dion Phaneuf trade happened exactly one year ago," I said. "Why has this blockbuster deal – which still seems so incredibly one-sided on the surface – failed to lift the Leafs? Why are they further away from a playoff spot right now than they were a year ago at this time?"

"I don't know," she said.

"Was putting the 'C' on his jersey a mistake?"

"I really don't know."

"Two, what about truculence?" I asked. "Why isn't this team as tough – and I'm talking about team toughness here – as promised this summer? Why is this team not playing like a Brian Burke team? Why do they let other teams dictate the tone and pace each night? Why do they let the other guys set the aggression levels?"

"This is pathetic," she said.

"Three, why can't this team transition for more than a period before the wheels suddenly fall off and puck support vanishes and they start creating sloppy turnovers like unpaid interns at a Pillsbury factory? The backend was supposed to be one of the best in the league. Why do we have 547 giveaways, second only to Edmonton? Why does Francois Beauchmin lead the league in giveaways? Why is Luke Schenn second? Why is Tomas Kaberle also in the Top 10?"

"You need help," she said. "You all do."

"Four, why is this team not ready to play when the puck drops? Why do they look so sleepy? The good news is the Leafs are 11-4-3 when they score first. That's a .611 winning percentage. The bad news is they have allowed the opposition to score first in 31 of 49 games this season. And when this happens, they are a horrifying .258.

"They haven't scored first in a game since January 6, when they beat St. Louis in a shootout. Is it team focus? Is it desire? Is it preparation? Is it the silent return of blue-and-white disease?"

"Are you done?" she asked.

"I just need some answers," I said. "We all do."

Phil Kessel: First in our hearts, last in the fantasy draft

Phil Kessel was picked first in the NHL fantasy draft last night! But only if you wake up this morning and watch it backwards.

That's right. Last. He was picked... last. Our magnificent bastard lone representative at tomorrow's All-Star game is now the NHL equivalent of a clumsy nerd in grade school. Instead of donning a visor for tomorrow’s game, he may as well wear thick glasses with masking tape. I hope there's enough room on his jersey for a number, surname and the hand-scrawled "KICK ME" sign Team Lidstrom teammates are sure to slap on his back before the third period.

Man alive, that fantasy draft took me back to Grade 8 gym class.

Standing near a hastily erected volleyball net in red shorts that were three sizes too big. Wearing a fake smile that telegraphed both personal shame and a silent cry for help, like I was posing for a picture that would be mailed to potential sponsor parents.

Trying not to make eye contact with the pretty girls. Hoping the popular boys didn't decide today would be another great day to shove me into my locker or mock the picture of Greg Terrion glued to my biology binder.

Waiting, waiting, and waiting for my name to be called.

And if you substitute "Team Staal" for Team Heather, "Team Lidstrom" for Team Johnny and "Phil Kessel" for "The Skinny Guy With Black Hair, I Forget His Name," my experience usually went something like this:

1. Cam Ward (Team Staal)
2. Steven Stamkos (Team Lidstrom)
3. Alexander Ovechkin (Team Staal)
4. Duncan Keith (Team Lidstrom)
5. Daniel Sedin (Team Staal)
6. Henrik Sedin (Team Lidstrom)
7. Zdeno Chara (Team Staal)
8. Shea Weber (Team Lidstrom)
9. Rick Nash (Team Staal)
10. Tim Thomas (Team Lidstrom)
11. Henrik Lundqvist (Team Staal)
12. Daniel Briere (Team Lidstrom)
13. Marc Staal (Team Staal)
14. Dustin Byfuglien (Team Lidstrom)
15. Patrick Sharp (Team Staal)
16. Jonathan Toews (Team Lidstrom)
17.Dan Boyle (Team Staal)
18. Marc-Andre Fleury (Team Lidstrom)
19. Carey Price (Team Staal)
20. Jonas Hiller (Team Lidstrom)
21. Jeff Skinner (Team Staal)
22. Brad Richards (Team Lidstrom)
23. Kris Letang (Team Staal)
24. Keith Yandle (Team Lidstrom)
25. Claude Giroux (Team Staal)
26. Brent Burns (Team Lidstrom)
27. Erik Karlsson (Team Staal)
28. Martin Havlat (Team Lidstrom)
29. Corey Perry (Team Staal)
30. Anze Kopitar (Team Lidstrom)
31. Patrik Elias (Team Staal)
32. Matt Duchene (Team Lidstrom)
33. David Backes (Team Staal)
34. Loui Eriksson (Team Lidstrom)
35. Paul Stastny (Team Staal)
36. Phil Kessel (Team Lidstrom)

It's an awful feeling to be picked dead last by your peers. And while the All-Star game is just good fun – and Kessel was rewarded for this dubious distinction with $20,000 for the charity of his choice and a new Honda CR-Z – the fantasy draft was yet another wedgie for Leaf fans this season.

Does this mean anything? Is it a shot at Kessel? A shot at the Leafs, the city of Toronto... us?

What does it mean?

While you're thinking about this, I'll just be over here, baking a new batch of lemon squares for the weekend.

 

Never mind the popular kids, Phil! Pay no heed to their inside jokes and wild stories about the party you weren't invited to last night! Don't pull their fingers when they ask and do not take a closer look inside that garbage can!

Stay focused! Light it up tomorrow! Make us proud! Revenge...

 

PHOTO: CHRIS SEWARD/RALEIGH NEWS & OBSERVER/MCT

Guest Post: The undeniable genius of Brian Burke

 

Memo To Leafs Nation: Stop Living In The Eternal Present 

BY JIMMY "OSTRICH LOVER" TANNER

 

Fire Burke!
Fire Wilson!
Burke is an idiot!
Wilson is a fool!

I read a lot of hockey articles on the Internet – probably too many – and that is all I ever seem to hear. I don't like to admit it publicly but I often comment on these articles under the moniker "Ostrich Lover" and I too am often – make that always – called an idiot for my optimistic outlook on the job Brian Burke is doing to rebuild the Leafs.

Like Burke, the Ostrich Lover is just misunderstood; but that does not make him any less right.

True, the Leafs appear well on their way to making it a minimum of eight calendar years before the next playoff game will be played in Toronto. In the seven years so far, the Leafs have not managed to get a single Top 3 draft selection and have spent most of this time hovering above the lottery and below the playoffs. This is causing a lot fan angst and understandably so.

I think, however, Burke is taking the heat, not for what he has failed to do, but for Toronto's 43 years and counting without a Stanley Cup.

Burke does not deserve to be fired, or in my opinion, even criticized. It is my contention that he should be praised. The Leafs boast a core group of young players that should excite fans in this city. We now have an opportunity to watch this core group grow as individuals and blossom into a team that will be competitive for years.

So to properly assess this team, you must forget the past, leave four decades of baggage at the door and simply look forward. Instead of the Leafs, let's pretend we are gathered here to discuss the Thrashers or Blue Jackets. Let's imagine this same team, same trades and same management group – just without 43 years of abject failure.

Such an objective examination of this Leafs team reveals a lot of young talent and at least a half dozen players with superstar potential.

Let's look at Burke with an open mind and maybe I can convince you he is actually doing a stellar job. This is going to require you to put aside your groupthink mentality, your preconceived notions and your disappointment in the past.

Let's see if we can get away from the Achilles' heel of hockey coverage, which is an impulse to live in the eternal present. This impulse is exactly what prevents us from seeing the Leafs as a future contender.

Living in the eternal present is also why fans and writers seem to forget the most important thing about players such as Phil Kessel and Dion Phaneuf: These are kids with a lot of upside potential, not veterans in the twilight of their careers.

Keep an open mind and let's see if Burke is in fact the saviour we thought he was going to be – as four other people and I still believe.

Let's get started.

First, at no time in recent memory, have the Leafs ever possessed such a core group of young players with such high ceilings: Phil Kessel, Luke Schenn, Dion Phaneuf, Keith Aulie, Jussi Rynnas, Jonas Gustavsson, James Reimer, Nazem Kadri, Carl Gunnarsson, Nikolai Kulemin, Mikhail Grabovski, Kris Versteeg and Tyler Bozak.  

We, the fans, have a chance to watch some of these guys mature before our eyes as they hopefully become stars. I think a lot of fans either don't know or they forget that the prime of a professional athlete begins around the age of 27. Bozak, for example, is following a similar career trajectory as Martin St Louis – fast, defensively responsible, smallish, creative and undrafted.

The presence of Kessel, Kadri, Phaneuf, Schenn – and some of the best goaltending prospects in hockey – should be enough reason for optimism and if we were really talking about the Blue Jackets and not the Leafs, it certainly would be.

The major criticism of Burke begins and ends with the Phil Kessel trade, which has been debated to the point of insanity. I wish I could avoid talking about it. I really do.  But if the popularity of the movie Transformers taught us anything, it is this: Just because a majority believes something does not make it true.

Did Burke overpay for Kessel? No. Was this a bad trade? No.

Consider:

1. Kessel is 23 years old and has better stats than Alexander Semin, Daniel Sedin, Pavel Datsyuk or Henrik Zetterberg had at the same age.

2. There is not a legitimate scout or commentator who does not think Kessel could potentially score 50 goals with a true playmaking center. Kessel may also be the most exciting skill player I have seen on the Leafs since I started watching in the 80s – this includes both Jamie Macoun and his formidable mustache.  

3. Playing with Bozak and Matt Stajan, and while coming off a major injury, Kessel scored at nearly a 40-goal pace last season. 

4. Kessel was the 5th overall selection in 2006 – a very deep draft (look it up). The two first round picks traded for him were in relatively weak draft years.  Draft picks might not work out – but Kessel already has. People say he is not a franchise player – but he might be. Remember: Daniel Sedin wasn't a franchise player at 23, either.

Finally, without even touching on the complete heisting that was the Phaneuf trade, the main reason Burke should be cheered and not jeered is for sticking to his guns.

The system he and Ron Wilson implemented is designed to let the players learn and perfect it so that when the finished team – Burke himself says we are yet to see it – takes to the ice, it will play a high-octane, hard-forechecking game. Burke has sacrificed some wins in the eternal present for winning in the future. But he is also not boring us with defensive hockey while we wait, something else worthy of praise.

Faced with giving Boston another high pick this season – and under non-stop pressure from all corners of Leafs Nation – Burke could have blinked and traded the blank cheque that is Luke Schenn to just about any team in hockey for just about anything he wanted (within reason). That he has refused to make this deal, or other similarly hasty moves, shows incredible courage and commitment to his vision.

In conclusion, Burke is an extremely intelligent man. He has repeatedly resisted the urge to panic. He obviously sees something in his roster the fans and media – with their wagging fingers and groupthink mentality – have missed.

His actions thus far are not consistent with a man who only wants to squeak into the playoffs, an oft repeated and incorrect accusation. His actions do not reflect those of a man who has "sacrificed the future."

Burke entered this season with a young and inexperienced team. He has a plan and a strategy. He has faith in the young core of players he has already assembled. And he has faith he can add the finishing pieces to finally bring an end to the 43 years and counting.

In short: Brian Burke believes in what he is doing. Given his track record, you should too.

 

Aspiring hockey writer Jimmy Tanner is a student at Laurentian University. Ostrich Lover is a prisoner inside Jimmy's mind. They both live with Mr. Tanner's wife and their two children in Barrie.

 

This piece was pre-approved by hoofheartz. A Leafs Fan Blogs welcomes story pitches and ideas for guest posts. Email: vmenon@thestar.ca

 

MAIN PHOTO: RICK MADONIK/TORONTO STAR

The NHL and Stan Lee: Do they hate the Leafs?

How's your vacation going so far? Me, I feel so relaxed after only one day. I can barely remember the 624 missed shots that have taken 1,937 days off my life this season.

And yet, strangely, I also miss those magnificent Leaf bastards.

I know, right? It's an illness. We are all sick in the head.

Anyhow.

You've no doubt heard about this Guardian Project, to be officially unveiled at the All-Star Game this weekend. And you've no doubt thought: Why is a professional sports league collaborating with the creator of Spider-Man to produce a new series of superheroes based on NHL teams but not set in the world of hockey?

Like spam, New Coke, flying cars or Paula Abdul, the Guardian Project just doesn't make much sense. But now that most of the Guardians have been revealed, there is another question we should be asking here in Toronto: Do the NHL and Stan Lee hate the Leafs?

Have we Leaf fans not suffered enough this season? The acute depression caused by losing streaks? The failed comebacks? The ever-shrinking speck along the horizon that is the eighth and final playoff spot? Dion Phaneuf's shooting accuracy?

Is all of this not enough? Now we have to be the laughingstock in a make-believe world?

Look at the other Guardians.

The Avalanche is shooting ice bolts from his fingertips. The Flame is melting enemies with fire surging from his eye sockets. The Bruin has grizzly fangs and the head of a bear, which can only mean he was loosely based on Zdeno Chára.

The Red Wing has "wings that resemble an F-14 fighter jet" and the power to "telekinetically manipulate anything mechanical." The Panther has "razor sharp gold tipped claws that can slash through 6-inch thick metal walls." The Blackhawk has "six wing blades that when deployed extend from his body and allow him to fly like a human dragonfly."

Now look at our Guardian. Look at that monstrosity!

NHL? Stan Lee? Really?

All the other Guardians have ferocious features and dazzling superpowers and you turned us into a... tree?

And don't even try to tell me this is because we are the "Leafs," okay? The Penguin has human legs! The Shark can breathe on land! The Panther walks upright!

Oh, and I bet they're all just thrilled to be fighting evil alongside The Maple Leaf, what with his immobile trunk-legs and gnarly deformities and terrifying photosynthesis.

The other Guardians have sleek metallic torsos and bulging muscles. Our Guardian is "composed entirely of wood." The other Guardians strike menacing poses. Our Guardian looks like he's waiting for a bus, a bus that only picks up harmless tree people with beach ball faces.

The other Guardians fire laser beams or manipulate the weather or ride tsunamis and futuristic motorcycles. Our Guardian plans to obliterate dark forces with "sticky sap bombs" and his ability to "communicate with the plant world."

How is our Guardian supposed to believe in himself when he can be felled by an errant cigarette butt or Asian longhorn beetle or frigging Woody Woodpecker?

I mean, honestly.

We have enough to worry about with our team. Now we have to deal with fans of other teams posting pictures to Google and claiming this is our Guardian? Now we face ridicule for our win-loss record and our superhero?

Shame on you, NHL. And shame on you, Stan Lee.

We Leaf fans deserved better.

 

Guest Post: When 99 turns 50

Happy Birthday, Wayne

BY FRANK McKENNA

It took Wayne Gretzky, the 17-year old centre for the Indianapolis Racers, five games to score his first professional goal, interestingly enough against the Edmonton Oilers. Four seconds later, he potted another.

Thus began one of the most exciting scoring streaks in professional sport.

The Great One scored with millions of people around the world. Not just hockey fans, but everyone who enjoys the thrill of incredible performances. He reached legendary status. And in doing so became one of Canada’s most famous ambassadors. And what a great ambassador he was – and remains.

Wayne is a well-grounded, decent human being. In all his success, he has stayed true to the values he was taught as a young kid: hard work, loyalty and dedication.

I don’t think he has ever lost the anticipation of lacing up his skates for the first time on his grandparent’s farm, nor the excitement of those first few strides. He still finds pure joy in the game.

The magic is in the moments Wayne created. Every time he touched the puck, circled the play, set-up shop behind the opponent's net. We never tired of his show. Though, it must be said, Leaf fans would like to forget about one particular goal in 1993, which robbed the nation of a Montreal-Toronto Stanley Cup Final!

Wayne turned 50 today. For me, and countless others, he will always be a magical 99.

Happy birthday, Wayne!

Your friend and fan,

Frank

 

Frank McKenna is Deputy Chair of TD Bank Group and works closely with Wayne as a TD brand ambassador. Frank has served as the Canadian Ambassador to the United States and Premier of New Brunswick.

This is his first piece for A Leafs Fan Blogs.

 

MAIN PHOTO: LARRY MACDOUGAL/CANADIAN PRESS

Game 49: We're heading into an all-star break? Praise the Lord

Let's begin with some fantastic news: The Leafs do not play again until February 1.

I never thought the day would come when a week without these magnificent deranged bastards could feel like a blessing from high above. But that's exactly how it feels.

Lord, I salute you for this temporary reprieve! I am down on bended knees, hands clasped, thanking you for the all-star break!

I can't wait to do normal things for the next six nights. Read magazines, go to a restaurant, tuck my kids into bed... not wander the streets alone after midnight, muttering like a madman about botched power plays and hot opposition goalies.

You know? Just normal, healthy activities. Quite unlike the abnormal, unhealthy activity that is watching the 2010-2011 Toronto Maple Leafs suck our souls into a jagged vortex of swirling misery and compounding grief.

Should we even bother talking about tonight's shutout loss in Tampa? I mean, what's the point? It'll just cut into our vacation time and delay the healing before the hurting begins again next week.

The thing is, even if you didn't watch tonight – by the way, congratulations on that wise decision – you can probably guess what happened. No, seriously, close your eyes and try.

The puck has just dropped in Tampa. What do you see?

That’s right. There are no Leafs on the ice! It's so weird! NO LEAFS!

Now what do you see?

That’s right. Tampa is dominating the first period because there are... no Leafs on the ice. NO LEAFS!

Where are they? What happened to them?

Tampa is blitzing poor James Reimer and sashaying around his non-existent teammates. They are drawing penalties and giggling on the bench and flying in alone on breakaways and odd-man rushes.

They are even doing TV interviews DURING the period!

It's inexplicable, really. Or maybe it's not. I don't know anymore. Do you? Is there any logical explanation for any of this? Do the Leafs even care? More important, why do we?

Once again, this Leafs team failed to report for the first period. Once again, the opposition was forced to embarrass a mirage of harmless ghosts in phantom jerseys as frantic NHL execs called the cops to report 25 missing people.

COPS: "What do these missing people look like?"

EXECS: "We're not sure. They keep changing!"

The shots after the first were 17-4 for Tampa. If not for the sensational play of Reimer, the score would have been 7-0 instead of 2-0. In fact, the most miraculous part about this hauntingly familiar evening was Reimer's questionable decision to remain a Toronto goalie and not escape through a fire exit during the first intermission, fleeing into the Florida shadows to live under an assumed identity as a wrangler of dangerous snakes.

God knows he would be safer in that line of work. God knows he would get more support. God knows he deserves better.

Close your eyes again. What happened next? Think.

That's right! The Leafs suddenly arrived from their parallel universe, where time is elastic and exertion means inertia. They climbed into their corporeal bodies, 20 minutes late. They started to compete and took the game to Tampa. They tried hard, real hard, and played pretty darn well. Or Tampa got bored and decided to start their all-star break a little early. Tough to say, really.

Then what happened? Yes, yes, go on...

That's also right! The Leafs ran out of time. They came up short. They couldn't "solve" the other guy in net. They looked like they may climb back on the score sheet, they looked like they kind of, sort of, maybe wanted to win but then... oh no... yes... they lost.

So here we are, heading into the all-star break. I'm not sure this team deserves a break but, holy hell, we sure do.

Enjoy it! Breathe! Be normal and healthy! Sleep! Eat well! Laugh! Socialize! Live!

No more Leafs for a week? Take it away, k.d. lang...

 

 

Game 48: More great lessons from a remedial course called Losing

Good evening, Leafs Nation! And welcome to tonight's post, awkwardly subtitled "The Same Old Lessons This Young Leafs Team Keeps Learning As We Watch With Grimacing Smiles."

If that phrase sounds familiar, it's because someone, somewhere, says it after each and every loss. At this very second, for example, a card-carrying citizen within our mythical borders is scrubbing blue-and-white face paint off his or her face and reciting these exact words into a bathroom mirror: "Yes, they lost 6-4 to Carolina. But, man, those guys learned some valuable lessons tonight!"

Did they? I suppose. But here's the thing: Since so many of these lessons have already been taught over the previous 47 games, why are they not getting absorbed? Shouldn't players on this team already have honourary degrees from Princeton, Harvard and Cambridge?

So what's the problem inside this year's school of hard knocks?

Are these magnificent poor Leaf bastards not paying attention? Are they doodling pictures of four-legged Zambonis in their notepads and spitting gobs of bubble gum at each other instead of studying for game day exams? Are they having trouble concentrating, what with all the other kids yammering excitedly about "playoffs"?

I have no idea. But maybe it's time we started jotting down some of these lessons. You know, so they can refer to them before games.

Here, I'll get started with 10 Random Lessons From Tonight's Game:

1. When an opposition player winds up at the blue line or inside the circles, do not screen your goalie or deflect the shot past him.

2. When on the power play, it's important to move your feet and move the puck out of your zone as quickly as possible. After this transition, you should create traffic in front of the other team's net. Simply passing the puck around as if you're playing a game of hot potato is not an effective way to score with the man advantage.

3. Unless your name is Colton Orr, Jay Rosehill, Mike Brown or Clarke MacArthur, do not start throwing gloves-on punches at opposition players who are known to drop their gloves because these players are capable of suddenly dropping their gloves and breaking a human face.

4. If you end up getting several power plays early in a game, including a two-man advantage, there's an excellent chance the referees will call some penalties on your team later in the game. Stay disciplined and don’t make this easy for the officials to do. Also: score on your chances. Please.

5. It's never a bad idea to fake a shot on a breakaway. It's always a bad idea to pass when you're alone in the slot. Horrible idea: Missing the net by 134 feet when you're 8 feet away.

6. Shooting the puck directly at an NHL goaltender may result in bruising and subtle psychological intimidation. But it rarely results in a goal.

7. Blind drop-passes near the opposition blue line are not recommended.

8. Working hard is great. Working smart is better.

9. If the game is tied mid-way through the third, do not get trapped in the offensive zone if there is even a 1 per cent risk of an odd-man rush going the other way.

10. Go to the opposition net and good things will happen. Leave opposition players alone in front of your net and bad things will happen.

So there you have it.

If any of this sounds harsh or needlessly sarcastic, I apologize. Truly I do. That was not my intention. You guys actually played a half-decent game tonight. You came back from a 3-1 deficit in the third and nearly stole this one.

Unfortunately, "half-decent" is not good enough and "nearly" is irrelevant where point totals are concerned. So if you want to graduate from this remedial course and get accepted into the next one – Critical Lessons in Winning – it's time to start remembering the curriculum.

Get some rest, you lovable kooks. Next test is tomorrow in Tampa. Class dismissed.

***

For you, hoofheartz:

 

MAIN PHOTO: RICHARD LAUTENS/TORONTO STAR

Game Day: Why the Reimer recall is good news for Gustavsson

The decision to recall James Reimer can be interpreted in many ways. But first and foremost, this is clearly an intervention for Jonas Gustavsson.

And his response to this intervention – even if nobody uses that word – will shape his future with the Leafs.

I was listening to Deerhunter's Halcyon Digest last night and for some reason two songs – "Memory Boy" and "Helicopter" – reminded me of Goose. It's hard not to feel sorry for this poor guy.

What has happened? Are we witnessing a sophomore slump? Is Gustavsson putting too much pressure on himself to match the outer-orbital greatness achieved in Sweden?

Or is The Monster now spooked by something we can't see?

Whatever the reason, the 26-year-old is at a crossroads. Before the season started, the plan was simple: Gustavsson would march along the chosen path as the team's future No. 1 goalie.

He would ascend, once again, toward the greatness.

Veteran J.S. Giguere, the present No. 1, would mentor the talented protégé. Goaltending coach Francois Allaire would continue to fine-tune the youngster's game for North America, working on angles, rebound control, lateral movement and positional dynamics.

Alas, the plan has not proceeded as expected.

Gustavsson has played in 23 games this season. He has 6 wins, 13 losses and two OT setbacks. His save percentage is .890, which ranks 44th in a 30-team league. His GAA is an equally grim 3.29, which ranks 43rd.

But even more troubling than cold numbers is the mysterious evaporation of his confidence. Instead of the outer-orbit, Gustavsson is trapped in a personal hell of fiery insecurity and paralyzing self-doubt.

After overcoming cardiac problems and culture shock to start last season, after grinning in interviews and promising to "steal" some games from Vesa Toskala, the soft-spoken bravado has turned into shell-shocked silence.

During his last start, the disastrous 7-0 loss to the Rangers, Gustavsson looked like a child lost at the mall. He was forlorn and traumatized, despondent and alone. When he was yanked in the first after surrendering three goals in 2:26 seconds, it was painful to watch him on the bench.

His mask remained on, as if by protective instinct. His eyes kept darting up at the scoreboard, as if he couldn't quite believe what just happened. And twice his padded legs kicked out violently, an almost involuntary physical act borne from acute psychological frustration.

He had reached a new low.

This brings us back to Reimer. And here, though Gustavsson probably doesn't want to hear it, the news is good: In a perverse way, this recall proves the team still believes in him.

If they didn't, he would likely be starting tonight's game against Carolina. They would keep playing him, possibly showcasing him for a trade. They would let him, force him, to work through this slump in real time.

They would leave Jonas Gustavsson to fight his demons on his own.

But by calling up Reimer, the Leafs are doing the opposite: They are trying to save Gustavsson. They are recognizing he needs an extended time-out. They sense he is adrift at sea and they are tossing him an anchor before his confidence vanishes in the chop.

They are intervening to free him from his personal hell.

As with any intervention, this will be difficult at first. Barring injuries or an unforeseen personnel change, my guess is Reimer will now split the workload with Giguere. All this talk of carrying three goalies or bringing the kid up because there is roster room is a red herring.

For now, it's The Jiggy & Reimer Show.

For Leaf fans, meanwhile, the Reimer recall is also good news because it indicates the team still believes it can take a mad dash for the final playoff spot, however improbable. That's the bottom line: Reimer is confident and itching to help win games down the stretch.

As for Gustavsson, he may go down to the Marlies for a conditioning stint. If he agrees to such an assignment, he wouldn't have to clear waivers. Or he may continue to work on his game with the coaching staff until the intervention is deemed a success.

Whatever happens, whatever sound bites trickle out at the official level, Gustavsson is now on a break. But when he's ready to return, the chosen path will be waiting.

 

PHOTO: CHRIS YOUNG/CANADIAN PRESS

Game 47: (Insert your own cliché for trying hard but coming up short here)

Good evening, unicorns and zombies. The Lizard King walks alone in the crimson sunset.

As mentioned this morning, I am sick and currently hopped up on a possibly dangerous cocktail of meds, one that is wreaking havoc on my senses. I am seeing things. I am hearing things. I can't feel my toes.

So for your sake, I shall be brief this evening.

Let me begin by thanking you for writing your own headline. I was busy sobbing as my walls undulated like bowls of Jell-O in an earthquake. I appreciate your help.

Let me continue by telling you the picture above this post has very little to do with tonight's 4-1 loss. Okay, it has nothing to do with it. I was simply fascinated by the bunnies – why are they trying to hypnotize us? – and hope you feel the same.

What can I tell you?

It's a shame the NHL doesn't give points for noble efforts. It's a shame we all can't pile into the glowing time machine someone left in my kitchen and go back to November and December with an urgent message for the magnetic Leaf bastards: "Hey! Don't blow any easy games! Play to win each and every night! No let-downs! Otherwise, it'll be January 22 and, trust us, you'll regret all the points you frittered away like Frisbees in a hurricane."

Did the Leafs play a good game tonight? Yes. Did they deserve better? Yes. Was that an entertaining contest? Yes. Is losing still losing? Yes. Do the playoffs seem less likely with each passing day? Yes. Is there a rhinoceros on my front porch?

In a way, tonight's game was a microcosm of the frustrating parts of this entire season. When Tyler Bozak failed to score on a breakaway, it felt like all the failed or botched scoring chances since October. When Mikhail Grabovski missed the yawning cage, it was a reminder of all the lost opportunities over the first 47 games.

Alex Ovechkin picked a hell of a night to break out of his slump. But even his three goal performance did not feel like a normal hat trick. It felt like another reminder: This Leafs team is still so young, so fragile, so vulnerable to the greatness of others.

And, please, let's not get started on the scene-stealing work of 21-year-old Braden Holtby. A few hours ago, we were like, "Who?" But then the Washington goalie went out and toggled between solid and unbeatable. He stole a game. And not sure if it's the meds or churlish second-guessing but why can't I stop thinking about another young goalie who rhymes with Dames Kymer?

Hopefully, the Leafs "learned something" from tonight's spirited loss. Hopefully, they bonded in defeat. Hopefully, these games – which are starting to feel like handfuls of dirt tossed on a coffin – will fulfill a higher purpose when we are born again in the promised land.

As the leprechaun standing on my coffee table just said: "There will be more struggles. But don't worry. We'll get there yet."

TOP PHOTO: FREDERIC J. BROWN/AFP/GETTY IMAGES

Game Day: When a Leaf becomes tabloid fodder

I stumbled out of bed this morning with a high fever and the shakes. I think the ups and downs of this season have compromised my immune system. Or I picked up a magical superbug in the comments section from Psychic Alecia.

At any rate, this is not the sort of thing I needed to read 10 minutes ago: According to the muckraking scoundrels at TMZ, "Mike Komisarek is on thin ice with the LAPD after the hockey player allegedly punched a woman in the face at an L.A. nightclub earlier this month."

Please God let there be a logical explanation.

Citing law enforcement sources, the report says a woman filed a police report after "Komisarek decided to lift her up in the air at a Hollywood nightclub... We're told the woman claims she demanded Komisarek put her down – but he refused – so she slapped him in the face. The woman claims Komisarek immediately set her down and then punched her in the face, causing her to bleed."

The team is investigating and had no comment.

Moving on.

In advance of tonight's visit by the suddenly offensively-challenged Washington Capitals, here's a great piece on Mikhail Grabovski's breakout season by my friend and colleague Paul Hunter.

My favourite quote: "The first 10 games I played with MacArthur, he didn't know me, I didn't know him. But after we played more games, he finds me on the ice and I score goals."

My impression of Grabbo at a drive-thru window: "You make Big Mac for my stomach and I full. Thank you."

We need more of this no-nonsense focus down the stretch.

Line-up changes for tonight: Fredrik Sjostrom and Mike Brown are back and Marcel Mueller has returned to the Marlies. Meanwhile, Colton Orr will be a game day decision after he face-planted into the ice Thursday during his scrap with Anaheim's mustachioed pugilist, George Parros.

I know the feeling, Colton.

PHOTO: NATHAN DENETTE/CANADIAN PRESS