Angela's news and "Words on the Wall"...

"I'm confused," Angela said at the outset of our conversation last evening at 7:56 p.m. "Really confused."

She sounded groggy and sluggish. I hadn't heard quite this sound before. Her affect wasn't flat. She did not sound in the least depressed, but she didn't have the bounce in her voice I have come to expect lately. 

Angela had her third bilateral electroconvulsive therapy treatment 12 hours earlier – her 15th over the last eight weeks. Her first 12 were unilateral. This coming Monday, she will begin the final stretch of her 12-week treatment course.

"I COULDN'T REMEMBER WHY I WAS HAVING ECT"

"I came out of the anesthesia this morning and I couldn't remember why I was having ECT and I'm still foggy," she said. "I had to do some stuff on the computer and I couldn't remember how. Eventually it came back though..."

"I bought a motorcycle today," she announced, voice sounding a little more cheery. She had been looking at one for over a week. Last summer, her motorcycle was stolen and she's wanted to replace it ever since, but she hasn't been able to move on that decision until now.

She informed me that she did not have her customary afternoon post-ECT nap yesterday, either. 

Instead, she spent the whole day "doing things I had to accomplish," which included spending $16,000 on this new 2009 motorcycle.

"I spent money I don't entirely have," she said. "My mother is lending me $5,000, but when I talked to her about it earlier today, I couldn't really have a conversation with her, I was so confused. This evening, we talked again and I was feeling a little better."

I cut our conversation short. Clearly, she needed sleep. I sensed it and we discussed it. She admitted she was tired and going to bed right after she hung up the phone.

THIS MORNING SHE SOUNDED REFRESHED

At 10:42 a.m. this morning, she sounded like a different person when she answered the phone – refreshed, alert and bright as the day. It's sunny and will reach 18 degrees Celsius. 

"I'm much less confused, though some things are not back yet," she admitted. "I've only been up for about an hour and a half."

We talked about how she learned an important lesson, yesterday, about her need for a nap after her ECT that seems to "scramble my brain." Sleeps seems to unscramble it. 

SLEEP UNSCRAMBLES HER BRAIN AFTER ECT

Sleep heals. We chatted about it and she admitted that having a nap when she can fall asleep on the afternoons after her ECT treatments "may be an answer." 

She was giggling and laughing a lot during our talk. She reported that she was feeling "not too bad" – generally "normal" about her mood and life in general, with "not a lot of plans for the day." 

Usually, Angela sees her psychiatrist on Friday mornings, but today, her psychiatrist is attending a conference.

"I'm not nearly as confused as I was last night, not by a long shot," she said. "I'm feeling much better and my memories are coming back. It just takes a little time, which can be frustrating."

*   *   *   *   *

HONOURING THE MEMORIES OF PSYCHIATRIC PATIENTS PAST

About four weeks ago, Geoffrey Reaume sent me a note about an upcoming, intriguing and creative-sounding artistic initiative called "Words on the Wall" ~ a fundraiser for plaques for the 19th Century Patient-Built Wall.

Geoff and I go back quite a few years. I've interviewed him several times on a variety of topics related to the history of psychiatric treatment of "inmates" at the former Provincial Lunatic Asylum, now the site of the Centre for Addiction and Mental Health (CAMH) at 1001 Queen Street West. 

He is not only a "psychiatric consumer survivor" himself – and flourishing in his recovery, I might add – but also he is the author of Remembrance of Patients Past: Patient Life at the Toronto Hospital for the Insane, 1870-1940. 

This is fascinating and at times alarming history. Geoff is a dedicated and passionate advocate of honouring the memories of the patients who built this wall. He is the driving force of The Psychiatric Survivor Archives who freely and quite regularly shares his expertise and the stories behind the bricks for for people who wish to tour the wall with him.

And finally, Geoff is a York University assistant professor who teaches and researches in the area of disability studies and one of his courses is called Mad People's History. 

BUILD A BRICK WORK OF ART AND HELP PUT "WORDS ON THE WALL"

Now that I've given you Geoffrey's history, here's why he contacted me. 

On April 21 at the Gladstone Hotel, this special "Words on the Wall" event will be held in conjunction with This is Not a Reading Series.

You can take part. The Psychiatric Survivor Archives of Toronto is giving out bricks to serve as the basis for a work of art – possibly yours. Artists and groups, anyone, really, can use a medium of their choice to decorate or create an original brick-based work of art that will be sold by silent auction that night. The evening will raise funds for historic plaques to commemorate the history of the patient-built wall.

That evening, Geoff will also lead one of his engaging tours of "the wall," followed by a relaunch of the 2nd edition of his book, Remembrance of Patients Past. This evening will wind up with the silent auction.

The deadline for submissions is Wednesday, April 7 and to request a brick or for more information, email psychsurvivorarchives@gmail.com or phone 416-661-9975 or 416-809-1013.

WE MUST KEEP CHALLENGING DISCRIMINATION THOUGH EDUCATION

This is a universally significant event, I think, because we must never forget where we've come from, how important and vital our history is and how much work needs to be done to publicly educate everyone, young and old, about psychiatric issues past and present.

Without emotional health and well-being, we have nothing. 

We must challenge and keep challenging discrimination – through education.

We are the best experts. We all can raise our voices. We need to be heard. 

Taking the myth and mystery out of Adult ADHD...

I am no expert on Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder. 

Although between you and me? When I read the following list of common symptoms, I was sure I had eight-and-a-half out of nine of them:

• trouble maintaining focus or often being distracted

• lots on the go but nothing ever finished

• perpetual financial problems

• piles of paperwork scattered around home and office

• poor listening skills and talking excessively

• impulsive behaviours

• impatience

• frequent traffic accidents or routine speeding

• difficulty maintaining friendships or romantic relationships

When I confessed this to Marty, he straightened me out in one split second.

Isn't this what happens to you when you start reading about the symptoms of any health issue? 

Suddenly, you have most or all of them. You really feel them. That's what's so dicey about having too much information at your fingertips. Sometimes, it's not healthy. What do all these symptoms mean? In truth, it may seem that you have enough symptoms for a million and one disorders or diseases from Lupus to Leprosy, when in fact, you're fine. 

That's the power of suggestion. The trick is to be savvy and smart about the sources you use and to find the best information in the Internet. I'll get back to that in a minute. 

ADULT ADHD IS REAL AND NOT JUST FOR KIDS

I do not, to the best of my knowledge, have ADHD. (I'll check with Dr. Bob next week.) But some adults do. 

ADHD is not just for kids. In fact, the symptoms of child and adolescent and adult ADHD differ. (I mean how many five-year-olds have frequent traffic accidents or routinely speed?)

The first time I heard about adult ADHD was in May 2008. I'll never forget it.

I attended a weekend course for teachers in Collingwood sponsored by Seneca called The Great Teaching Seminar. During one session, we all sat around in a circle – about 40 of us. We were asked to disclose something personal.

One fellow I did not know – Seneca has eight campuses and thousands of faculty – started talking. He is a business professor, though he talked about how he used to work in a corporation.

He related how, several years before, while he was still working in business that he started having problems concentrating, having anxiety attacks, though he didn't know it was anxiety at the time. I can't remember all the details, but he said that gradually he began struggling so much at work – I'm sorry, but I don't remember exactly what it was he did – that his performance began faltering badly. He was forced to take some time off. He paid a visit to his doctor.

He was so stressed out, he could barely function, but it didn't take his doctor long to figure out that he was suffering with adult ADHD. This man admitted he was shocked.

WITH TREATMENT FOR ADHD HIS LIFE IMPROVED DRAMATICALLY

"I thought only kids get ADHD," he said to his doctor. Nope. His doctor prescribed some medication, helped to educate him on ADHD, gave him some strategies and tips to help him adapt to his new-found condition and carefully monitored how he responded to all his new treatment tools.

This man told us the difference in his life after he was treated for his ADHD was nothing short of miraculous. I'll never forget that he actually broke down and started to cry, the improvement in the quality of life had changed so dramatically. He decided, shortly after his symptoms began to subside and he was feeling better, to leave big business and take up teaching. He's never regretted his decision and it's paid off big time for his emotional health. He's so much happier, healthier and at peace with himself and his family.

ADHD IS MUCH MISUNDERSTOOD AND MALIGNED

Still, ADHD is among the most misunderstood and maligned mental health conditions. Left untreated, in adults, it can lead to addiction, divorce, bankruptcy, accidents, depression, anxiety, and even suicide.

Its symptoms are complicated because they can present in a multitude of different combinations with each individual. In addition to the devastating personal costs, ADHD in British Columbia alone directly and indirectly costs more than $500 million.

Like many people, Rick Green of The Rick Green Show, first suspected he had ADD, "when one of my kids was diagnosed," the Canadian actor/writer/director said, whose diagnosis was made after years of struggling with various symptoms. 

So high-powered Canadian entertainer Green teamed up with a high-voltage ADD medical specialist Dr. Umesh Jain, a psychiatrist and professor at the Centre for Addiction and Mental Health, the Canadian ADHD Resource Alliance, University of Toronto and the Centre for ADD Advocacy Canada and together they collaborated on a critically acclaimed documentary called ADD & Loving It.

Last year, they launched an absolutely riveting new web site called Totally ADD (www.totallyadd.com) – "A complete guide to ADD and ADHD in adulthood."

Then, with Jain, Green produced and directed an interactive workshop called Now What?! which helps adults recognize the symptoms of ADD. No easy feat.

THE NEW ADD WEBSITE IS FUNNY. ENGAGING. TERRIFIC.

First, I have to tell you in all honesty the website is terrific. Even if you don't have ADHD, you probably know someone who does. Why not learn about it? It will help you empathize. Besides, this website is fascinating to watch. Instructive. Engaging. Entertaining. And funny! Like nothing else I've ever seen.

Green said, "Based on personal experience and what I learned while developing the documentary and Totally ADD.com, I wanted to help people who were struggling but didn't know why or what they could do about it." 

He and Jain will be teaming up to offer their Now What?! workshop this Saturday, February 27 at The Ontario Science Centre in the Imperial Oil Auditorium from 1 p.m. to 4 p.m. for anyone over the age of 16. Tickets are $29 and available through www.TotallyADD.com.

Dr. Jain said the main message of this workshop is that life can be easier when you know what's causing your symptoms and you can get the help you need, help that's readily available.

"I am constantly inspired by what my patients are able to achieve," he said. 

UNDERSTAND YOUR STRENGTHS AND WEAKNESSES

"The key to success with ADD is to develop an understanding of your strengths and challenges, and then embrace those traits. When treated properly, ADD can be managed and even harnessed to the point that it becomes a driving factor in a highly successful life. 

"People such as Dr. Richard Branson, quarterback Terry Bradshaw, Olympic swimmer Michael Phelps, political savant James Carville, comedian Howie Mandel and many other famous and successful people have acknowledged that they had ADD."

The more you know about yourself, the more insight you have and the more emotionally healthy you can be.

So it is with my emotional and psychiatric health issues. That's why I continue to see Dr. Bob as often as I feel I need to see him. We work together peeling the onion, layer by layer. 

If you have any questions or concerns about ADHD, Saturday's interactive workshop at the Ontario Science Centre might help you face up to yourself and your fears. Once you know what's happening, your fears aren't so scary anymore.

Good luck and if you attend, please let me know what you learn. I'm always interested. Your sharing here will help lots of others.

*   *   *   *   *

I have intriguing and rather surprising news about Angela's progress with her ongoing ECT treatments as well as an unexpected announcement about my little Dandie Dinmont Terrier "bitch" Lucy, but I'm saving both for Friday morning's post.

See you then, have a lovely meantime, and speak soon.

Hidden Homelessness: One woman's story...

I often say to my students that "teaching is learning" and the same is true of journalism and perhaps even more, of blogging. There is a visceral connection between you and me in the blogosphere, often it grows beyond a virtual connection, too. It's very affecting and inspiring. 

This is the story of one of those times.

On Saturday night, I had a tough time falling asleep. My mind was whizzing. 

The day before, on Friday, while achy, feverish and sleeping most of time, felled by some sort of bug, I received an email from a member of our community here at Coming Out Crazy named Sandra Dawson.

She was clearly upset and for good reason. Through a series of emails and then a five-hour telephone conversation on Saturday evening, I discovered that Sandra's recovery journey is nothing short of miraculous. 

"When I was eight, my depression started. For no reason. I became glum, sad, moody cranky, often during the fall and spring. It was biological. I wasn't diagnosed at all until years later," she said. 

Sandra grew up in a comfortable and "privileged" military family, and as she was moving all over the country growing up, her behaviour began changing along with her moods.

"When I was about 10, I wrote a Christmas play and my teacher decided that I could direct it, but she fired me as the director because I was too bossy," she said, laughing at the recollection, perhaps a harbinger of the more exuberant moods she would experience later.

Initially, her mood swings were characterized by short episodes of increasingly severe depression, and occasional suicidality – her first attempt was when she was 11 years old, in school, with a pair of blunt, round-edge scissors. "I just knew I wanted to die," she said. A schoolmate spotted her and called her "Freak!" Nothing else happened. 

"We didn't talk about it in my family," she said. "We were repressed and didn't discuss our feelings or our emotions."

By the time she was in her early 20s, she was beginning to experience wildly euphoric manic moments as well as depression. Sometimes the two extreme moods occurred coincidentally, with "mixed episodes of mania/depression and hypomanic/euphoria. Depression with spikes of mania," she said. 

Eventually, Sandra started seeing a counselor, to no avail, then a psychiatrist who prescribed medication. "I was misdiagnosed as being depressed," but because of her own ignorance and fears about mental illnesses, her prejudice and discrimination, her negative stereotypes, she wouldn't take those drugs, even though she was suicidal.

She never went back to that doctor.

Sandra is now 42. She has been hospitalized approximately 35 times, calling herself a classic 'revolving door.' Most of those hospital stays, she stresses, were for relatively short periods of time – from a few days to two months.

"There were many times when my doctors didn't know what to do with me," she said from her home in Vancouver. Sometimes, they still don't, she added. 

Between these episodes, she typically has much longer periods of independence, emotional stability and productivity. 

At 27, a GP misdiagnosed her again and prescribed Prozac. This time, Sandra decided to take the medication, but it was disastrous for her. "It made me more manic."

Coupled with the death of her father, insecure living arrangements, travel, and another serious manic episode, her life started spiraling out of control. Suffering from Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, unable to work, for the first time in her life, she experienced hidden homelessness.

Four out of five (80%) homeless people in Canada don't live on the street. Most are improperly housed or on the verge of eviction, far too many are children. Women who earn less than men are more vulnerable to homelessness. The hidden homeless live in cars, couch surf or find temporary shelter in church basements or abandoned factories. 

Over the decade between 1994 and 2004, Sandra became homeless – but only four times. Years apart. Those episodes were short. She stayed in shelters for abused women, hospitals, or on friend's couches. She also lived in marginal housing like rooming houses and Single Room Occupancy hotels.

"I've been lucky," she said. "I've never lived 'on the streets' as in the stereotypical sleeping bag on a sidewalk. I am considered high functioning by my psychiatrists. Although my disorder is severe, I can look after my basic needs. Low functioning people need more help, but high functioning people can and do fall through the cracks and become homeless or at risk." 

These experiences were so searing, they turned her into a crusader, a passionate advocate, working professionally and within the community as a volunteer to help to understand, enlighten and fight hidden homelessness, and to ensure that more supportive housing is available especially for people with mental health issues.

She has a steady part-time job on the Mental Health Commission of Canada as a consultant, a person with lived experience of hidden homelessness, working on its newly launched, national multi-city study called At Home/Chez Soi.

Sandra is also on the board of Vancouver's Marine View Housing Society, a licensed and supportive housing project that began in 1975 and owns residential buildings in Vancouver for people with mental health difficulties. For years, she has also volunteered with her local arts community in several capacities. 

"It's so important to me. It makes me feel useful," she said.

Her work with the Mental Health Commission of Canada is one of her passions. 

On Sunday, Sandra was a presenter at a major national Vancouver conference on homelessness called Into The Light, which winds up today. She participated on a National Consumer Panel of peers with lived experience of homelessness and/or mental health issues involved in the At Home/Chez Soi project. These panelists represented cities of all sizes and discussion focused on pressing local issues in their respective areas. 

So why was she so upset when she wrote to me last Friday? 

When this four-year Housing First study was launched at a media event last week, Sandra bravely spoke out, telling her story about her own experiences with homelessness. She gave an interview to the press. Somehow, she was misrepresented and her story was badly distorted, so much so that she feared her credibility would be damaged and her reputation besmirched.

So she reached out to me and I'm so glad she did. I knew virtually nothing about hidden homelessness. It wasn't on my radar screen. Indeed, it was hidden. Invisible. Buried under the stereotype of the homelessness we see. I have started to scratch the surface. I will keep digging. 

Best of all, I've become acquainted with Sandra Dawson, one of the most courageous, generous-hearted people I have ever had the honour to engage with... and I sense we are more than acquainted. We have made a connection. I hope it will continue. There is so much more to share about the nature of homelessness – visible and hidden – especially among children and youth.

I have so much to learn. 

Thank you, Sandra.

A psychiatric chuckle...

As you know, on Wednesday, I attended a memorial celebration of the life of my husband's closest friend, film and television producer, director, screenwriter, and poet, Bill Davidson.

Actually, Marty was the M.C. I sat with about 40 of Bill's nearest and dearest, including his wife Mary, his two daughters, Wendy and Ann, and his granddaughter, Tabitha.

Tabby chose to read several of her grandfather's poems from a little collection called "A Baker's Dozen," that he sent to a very select group about eight years ago. As it happens, we were among them. 

I had read Bill's "things" as he called them at that time. They were enchanting, as I recall. Then Marty took them from me for safekeeping – I tend to misplace things – and stowed them in his office. I'd forgotten them, until Tabby started her charming recitation. One in particular stood out as being perfect for you. 

And as November is such a dreary month, especially for teachers overwhelmed with end-of-term marking, I thought we could all use a little chuckle from our darling friend Bill. 

Last evening I called Mary, and she gave me permission to post it.

I want you to know that Bill loved reading Coming Out Crazy, so I know he wouldn't mind my sharing one of his poems with you. He was a loyal member of our community.

First, these were written on a typewriter. A manual typewriter. You can tell, which makes them even more endearing. In his covering letter, he explained that he had written his poems at his cottage on Pig island near Whitefish Falls and Manitoulin Island, southwest of Sudbury. His motivation came from an old friend, retired Rutgers University psychology professor John L. Falk.

"We had been out of touch for over fifty years. To re-introduce himself, he sent me a classy, slim volume of poetry published here in Canada by Guernica Press.

"Apparently, during all his teaching years he had been writing poetry, over three thousand poems," Bill wrote in his covering letter, titled "Explanation" ... "For Sandy and Martin."

"I thought, why not just knock off some stuff that pops into my mind, for my own pleasure (and maybe for Mary, too) to entertain myself. 

"Now, I did something else to get myself kickstarted. I didn't want to poke fun of John's book, but I wanted to clearly establish my imposter credentials, my colossal conceit in pretending to write a short book of poems (things). So I claimed to have a publisher, Howler Monkey Press, and even wrote a series of reviews of my own work for the back cover."

Indeed, the return address on the manilla envelope that we received was "From the publisher's office: Howler Monkey Press, Port Hope, Ontario – no address, no phone, no email, no fax, no anything."

Imagine a big man, a commanding presence at 6-ft, 2-inches, with a broad smile and sparkly blue eyes, perched on a rock on his island, his typewriter on his lap, pounding away at his poetry. He was blissfully unwired up there.

His covering letter ended:

"I said, why not share this wacky stuff with my dear friends, Martin and Sandy, and maybe, just maybe, brighten up their day with a few twinkly chuckles. Enjoy!

"WARNING: If too painful, take this stuff with Celebrex!"

Tabitha read several of her grandfather's creations. Here's the one I think you'll appreciate most, including a few of his "advance reviews and comments"...

"A stunning disaster. A tribute to man's folly. Beats the Titantic. Sank immediately after launching." – Rear Admiral Ahab, retired skipper, Toronto Island Ferry.

"Highly recommended for infants and toddlers. From the Hickory-Dickory-dock school of poetry. Pablum for the masses." – The Brothers Grimm, professors of pornography, Humpty Dumpty Institute.

"The work of a buffoon. Forgettable, but not forgivable. His movies weren't so hot either." – Crusty McNasty, entertainment critic, The Toronto Star Weekly.

At the Annual Convention: The Return of the Fairytale Shamen. 

Based on an old English folk song.

These fellows, me thinks, 

are rinky dink shrinks, 

Willy Winky, Tom Cobly and all.

***

They're here to discuss

the probing of us, 

Uncle Siggy, Pope Carl and all.

***

They peddle their pills 

to cure all our ills,

Oedipus Rex, bad sex and all.

***

They stir up a gumbo

of cool mumbo jumbo,

bipolar, postpartum and all.

***

They unscramble our brains

for capital gains,

Lamberghinis, sunny condos and all.

***

It's buyer beware

at this sordid affair,

turkey niblits, juicy giblets and all.

***

They feed on our fear

they'll be back next year,

Goldilocks, Goosey Gander and all.

* FOOTNOTE: Proud to say, the fairytale shamen, good sports all, have asked Leonard Cohen to sing this rollicking folk song, during the opening banquet at next year's convention. If we wake him up in time. I need the royalties."

By the time Mary Davidson called me last night, I had already written another post. I'll save it for next week. It won't go stale. And I hope you don't mind this little detour from my usual harder focus on mental health and wellness.

Call it a "mental health day" post.  A break from the routine. A non-medicinal bromide. This has been a very difficult week for us. I'm glad that I was able to end it on a light note, and especially to be able to share with you the magic that was Bill Davidson. 

Speak soon and have a lovely and restful weekend. Be well and be good to yourselves. You deserve it!

I'm not blogging today. Or so I thought! :)

Today, I'm keeping this very short. Very, very short. It's really a note to say I'm not really blogging today, except this non-blog has turned into a blog, hasn't it? 

You see, something has come up and I'm unable to be here to write to you.

Don't worry. Everything is going to be fine. Just a bit of a blip in my world order. We all have them. Something comes up out of nowhere and throws you a punch. Hits you in the head. You waver a bit. You may even fall down. But you get right back up or you manage to stay upright somehow. 

You're stronger than you think. This is a positive.

You manage to rearrange your life because you have no choice. For me, it's all about resilience. Just having to bend and sway with the ever changing vicissitudes of life. That's life. It's no straight line. It's bends in the road. Hills and Valleys.

Positive psychology is an important branch of psychology. It's the real deal. Martin Seligman is a brilliant man. He's the founder of Positive Psychology. You can watch him talk about it. Get a lovely little lesson from the master. Have a look. It's worth 23 minutes of your time. Trust me!

I refuse to be a victim! You can do that, too! Refuse to be a victim. Refuse to allow psychiatrists to victimize you. Just don't buy their pathology. Their world view. Don't believe it. Learn to believe in yourself. If not yourself, then consider believing in Martin Seligman and Positive Psychology.

Learn to celebrate your life. Whatever it is. I teach a course in community service and leadership. I created this course. I teach my students to "make a difference" for their communities. Any community they choose. For the "greater good. And I love it. 

Teaching this course is an enormous privilege. I love this course. I have a great life. I make my life great. I insist on living a pleasant life, a good life – and my teaching and my own community service give my life enormous meaning. Not to mention the relationships and the people I cultivate in my life. The way I have learned to engage. I work on it. It's glorious work.

It makes me happy. You make me feel happy, too. Knowing you're there, makes me feel my life has meaning. That's what "happy" means to me.

You can feel these things, too. You can learn that. Listen to this short TED.com talk of his. TED stands for Technology, Entertainment and Design. Have a look. And be sure to watch Martin Seligman's talk on positive psychology. Please. For me! Let me know what you think. How you react. I want to know. Share your comments and ideas here in the comments. That's meaningful, too. Let's talk about Positive Psychology, here!

You'll love Martin Seligman. He's a wonderful tonic for life. He's better than any pharmaceutical drug. Martin Seligman can teach you how to feel better about your life. Right now.

The point is, I do everything I can to stay positive. Really positive. In the psychologically positive way. And metaphorically, too. I start manufacturing Lemonade out of Lemons with great gusto. I believe that all will be well. No matter what, all will be well.

This positive energy is very powerful. It's an attitude thing and everything is attitude.

Here's a little exercise I do with my students.

Read this word OUT LOUD: OPPORTUNITYISNOWHERE

What do you see? What did you say?

Opportunity Is Nowhere?

Or...

Opportunity is Now Here?

There's no right or wrong answer. This is just a perceptual exercise. 

I'm a half glass full kind of gal and that's what drives me – this wildly predominant and quite natural "cockeyed optimism" – and I always qualify by stressing the word "cockeyed". ;)

So, let's try to have a positive weekend. Let's try to work on our attitudes, just for today. Just for an hour, if you're feeling low. Today is a new day and I'm sure the sun will rise tomorrow and it will be a new beginning. That's positive in itself. I love mornings. Fresh slates. A clean page with nothing yet written on it. 

I love all the possibility in that. The power of possibility! You can make it positive.

I tell my students that when they go into a job interview, no one will ever ask them for their Grade Point Average, but if they exude a positive attitude, they have a greater chance of success. 

Attitude is everything and I think attitude is something to work on. Go for a walk outside. Breathe the fresh air. Find a nice park with lots of trees and lots of oxygen and fresh air. And breathe. It's good for your head and your soul. And something else. Do something nice for someone else. Anything. 

That's going to make your day!

It's going to be a beautiful sunny day, here in Toronto. Do me a favour. No matter how you're feeling, do something for yourself by doing something for someone else.

Do something nice, for yourself, too.. Something that will make you feel sensational.

Because you know what? You are sensational. You really are, in your own unique and special way. You're you and there's no one else on the planet like you. Never has been. Never will be. Isn't that amazing? 

Celebrate your uniqueness. Engage with someone. Enter into their world. Listen to their story. Lose yourself in another human being. Be there for them!

You'll turn today into a "Be Good To Me Day" – you'll see! Feel positive and enjoy the moment.

Hugs,

(Hugs are very positive, too!)

Speak soon!

sln

On Denial ...

Last week, I was in touch with my friend and mentor, Tufts University professor of psychiatry Dr. Ron Pies after the summer break. He mentioned that Elyn R. Saks had written a commentary called "Some Thoughts on Denial of Mental Illness" for the September 2009 issue of The American Journal of Psychiatry.

I can't download this journal article without paying a fee, so Ron kindly offered to mail me the piece, which arrived yesterday. As you may recall, I wrote a lengthy post about University of Southern California Associate Dean and Professor of Law, Psychology and Psychiatry Saks and her "memoir of madness" The Center Cannot Hold – back in April. 

What I didn't mention then was that I detested her use of language. It made me cringe. Saks is a fine writer, but her language screams with embarrassment, shame and for the most part, exposes her chronic denial of her florid psychoses and her lifelong battle with schizophrenia.

It took Saks years and years, far too many years, to be able to admit to herself that she had a mental illness. It was and is still clear in the way she writes that she's ill at ease and grappling with her diagnosis of schizophrenia. 

Her commentary is rational. Emotions are irrational. 

It seems to me that she is actually in recovery, but doesn't know it or doesn't want to know it – despite her extraordinary academic accomplishments and her meaningful and rich life. She's happily married and a highly respected academic.

Right now, I'm not going to challenge her rationale simply because I don't have time. Saks has degrees in literature and philosophy besides law. She is a brilliant woman, an excellent writer, and her "thoughts" are argued with the precision of a closing argument in a murder trial. 

It's Friday afternoon. I've just returned from teaching one of my classes. It's been a long week. My editor is leaving in an hour and a half, and I need to digest what Saks has written to challenge her ideas. But I will. 

For now, I will muse a bit about denial and mental illnesses on my own. This is a rich subject. I will leave my journalistic jousting with Ms. Saks for another day.

First, as you know, I am not in denial of my mental health issues or my mental illness – I always feel a little odd using the term "illness" when discussing the mind. I do not believe the much-hyped theory that mental illnesses are brain diseases caused by chemical imbalances in the brain. That's simply not been proven and it's too simplistic, as far as I'm concerned. 

I've never been in denial. I grew up believing, naively perhaps, that going to a psychiatrist to talk once a week was healthy and smart – like going to an allergist once a week to have allergy shots.

As an adolescent, I used to complain to my mother, "Why do I have to go to see Dr. McQuaid every week?" She would simply say, "If you had a broken leg, you'd go to a doctor who would put it in a cast to heal. Well, if there's something wrong with your mind, you go and talk to a psychiatrist every week and you feel better."

Coming from a predominantly medical family where everyone was either a doctor or a psychiatric social worker, I was socialized to believe that going to a psychiatrist was de rigueur even though I was the only kid I knew who did, back in the early 1960s.

I live my life out loud today because it never occurred to me that there was anything wrong with having a mental illness. I consider myself lucky. 

Over the years, people have always confided in me, but always in whispers. 

Several years ago, I was invited to speak to a group of women at the Ontario Ministry of Government Services. The event, which celebrates Women of Influence and Inspiration, took place during Mental Health Awareness Week in May. Linda Lane, the creator of the event who asked me to speak, selected me as one of that year's Women of Influence and Inspiration, but asked me to stay clear of anything that smacked of mental health. Instead, she wanted me to focus on my journalistic career and women's issues. 

When I arrived, there were more than 250 women seated in a large conference room. I started listening to the other speakers, all extremely successful, high-ranking women in government who had clearly broken through the glass ceiling. (I've always thought that glass ceiling was really a layer of men, but that's another story.)

As I listened, clearly, I knew I couldn't stick to my script. After all, I'm an advocate. Place me in front of an audience and I can't resist, especially during Mental Health Awareness Week. When my turn came, I started talking and slipping references to my mental illness into my speech. Funny references. Self-deprecating quips to show that having a mental illness doesn't mean you can't have a good life and a great career. It's all about having a positive attitude. 

The audience laughed in all the right places and seemed relieved that I wasn't talking about government business. Clearly, they were enjoying themselves. You could hear a pin drop.

After I finished to a resounding round of applause, there was a break. I had to leave and go right back to my office. As I slipped out of the room, a woman approached me. I'll never forget her. She was slightly hunched over. Her body language screamed out "Denial" – I knew what she was going to say. And I was right.

In a barely audible whisper, she said, "I have the same problem as you, but I would never tell anyone. I've had it for 16 years."

I listened to her as she told her story of loneliness and isolation. She spoke about how she kept it a secret. How she was afraid she would lose her job if anyone "knew"... and how hard it is not to be able to talk to anyone at work about it, especially when "I'm not feeling at my best."

You have no idea how many times I've heard this. And worse. Parents in denial for their children. Rather that seek the appropriate help, they take their troubled adolescents to every specialist in the world, except a psychiatrist or psychologist. In one case, when no "physical" problem could be found, a young boy of 15 was kept at home, out of school, far from friends, cloistered, and hidden away because his parents couldn't accept that perhaps he had an emotional or mental health issue.

That's one reason why the new website Working Through It so powerfully mitigates denial by showing that mental health issues are not only prevalent but treatable in a wide variety of ways and real people are doing the talking. 

Often, I'm told that I'm very open. This surprises people, this openness of mine. But I also find that when I'm open, others open up to me. They share the burden of their denial. And they feel better.

I'm convinced that there is no normal. That we're all "next to normal" and diagnoses can and often do more harm than good. Even in cases of psychosis and schizophrenia, there are so many people finding ways to recover.

And in recovery, they overcome their denial. 

Say "Yes" to Mental Health Recovery...

Yesterday a gentleman named Stephen Batson sent me an email. 

The subject line? "another country heard from" ...

It turns out that Mr. Batson is the Project Coordinator of the Michigan Recovery Center of Excellence, where "Recovery is the foundation of service delivery in the Michigan community mental health system," it states under Welcome to Michigan Recovery" on this website.

"The Michigan Department of Community Health (MDCH) has charged mental health providers, consumer leaders and other community stakeholders to work together to promote recovery-based service delivery models."

Stephen wrote to me because he liked my last post on – Coming Out In Class. 

(By the way, I'm happy to report that 15 students showed up in my class this morning. Earlier this week, I had seven students attend with nine registered. This morning, I had 15 attend with 20 registered. This, after I shared with them the fact that my community service is mental health advocacy and I have a long history of mental health problems. I even told them about this blog. Things are looking up.)

Stephen told me in his note that he found me on a blog that's been running since 2006 called The Recovering Life with the tagline – Observations on a Cultural Phenomenon – written by his friend Norm DeLisle.

Norman G. DeLisle runs a small, non-profit organization called the Michigan Disability Rights Coalition and blogs like a house on fire, posting five or six times a day. He's worked in disability advocacy for 37 years, has background in education, Montessori, and psychology. He seems to me to be a powerhouse who works tirelessly to raise awareness and make a difference. He doesn't miss a trick and his blog is well worth investigating.

It seems he posted my Wednesday entry on his blog and that's where Stephen Batson comes in. "Every story makes us feel good about our decision to live real and open ourselves to others," he wrote, inviting me to check out his site. I did. It's amazing.

Then he invited me to a Recovery Conference in Detroit on October 6, sponsored by the Detroit-Wayne County Community Mental Health Agency, a real going-concern when it comes to recovery judging by its publication, The Advocate News, which is devoted entirely to mental health recovery and hope. 

Stephen asked me if I knew Dr. Daniel Fisher of the National Empowerment Center, which he founded in Lawrence, Massachusetts, near Boston. "Talk about leadership," Stephen said. 

As a matter of fact, I do. Though I've never met him. I know Dr. Fisher's remarkable recovery story and his spiritual and healing approach to severe emotional trauma, often the root cause of mental disorders. Having hope is crucial.

I've read several of his books including "One Vision of Recovery" – his personal story – and "A PACE/Recovery Reader" – an excellent historical anthology of writings about psychiatry, mental illnesses and recovery. 

My psychiatrist, Dr. Bob, was the first person to enlighten me years ago about the bogus claims that mental illnesses are caused by chemical imbalances in the brain – a theory that has never been proven. Fisher elaborates in his writings. I'm reading stories from substantial sources that corroborate this all the time, but still, especially here in Canada, the biomedical model which is grounded on this theory seems to stand firm. Psychiatrists prescribe cocktails of drugs and insist on diagnoses that rarely fit the individual. And people are getting sicker all the time, when they could, indeed, recover and live meaningful lives. 

We have universal health care here in Canada, but we're in the dark ages when it comes to mental health recovery. We're the only country in the G8 with no national mental health strategy.

Dr. Fisher subscribes to "recovery at your own pace." When I interviewed him several years ago, he stressed that medications can be helpful but only as tools, in the short term. There are other tools. Toolboxes full of them. He stated that he has not taken any psychoactive medication for more than 30 years. Community, inclusiveness, helping people to feel that they are not alone, that there is hope are among his prescriptions for recovery.

His story is recovery story remarkable. 

Years ago, as a PhD student, Fisher became delusional, ironically while researching the biochemistry of the brain in schizophrenia. He was hospitalized several times, treated like an animal, shut away and ignored. His psychiatric diagnosis? Schizophrenia.

So demoralized, appalled and angry at how he was treated as a psychiatric patient, Fisher vowed, then, that if he ever recovered, he would become a psychiatrist to ensure that people with psychiatric diagnoses would be treated with dignity and humanity. 

He finished his PhD, went on to complete his MD at Georgetown University and his psychiatry residency at Harvard. He has become a leading Recovery advocate, as well as a clinical psychiatrist – one of a tiny handful of psychiatrists who "are out" and openly discuss their psychiatric histories.

His interview on January 20, 2005 in Medscape is fascinating. Fisher is the featured keynote speaker at the Detroit conference, called Redefining Our Roles in Recovery: It's Everybody's Business. Sadly, my teaching schedule prevents me from attending, though I'd do anything if I could, I told Stephen.

But I'm following the activities of the Michigan Recovery Center for Excellence and Norm DeLisle's blog.

Then, this morning, when I came home after my class, there was another email from Stephen Batson.

"Hi again. I was thinking, on the way home last night, that we have recovery stories on this site. In fact, I will be spending the next seven days in Michigan's upper peninsula visiting drop-in and Clubhouses. While up there I will be video recording more stories to post on the site.

"I'm writing to you today because your article IS a recovery story. Perhaps not like the life stories many others have told, but yours talks about an important aspect of a person's recovery ... relationships' socially valued roles. So, I'm asking for your permission to include your story among the collection we have gathered."

Of course, Stephen. It would be an honour. My story is yours. As I tell my students, I have a mantra, one of several. "I live my life out loud. No secrets. No lies."

It's one way to find peace of mind.

Have a great weekend. I wish you the best, always.

Speak soon.

My "Mad" Week...

Toronto's Mad Pride Week 2009 is drawing to a close tomorrow. I don't know if it's a coincidence or the stars just happened to have it in for me this week, but this has been, without a doubt, the craziest week I've had since beginning to write this blog.

I am sitting here exhausted. I have a stomach ache. Emotionally I'm all churned up inside. I had no idea this was going to happen. Last year's Mad Pride Week, the world didn't land on my door with questions, comments, concerns and complaints about the meaning of Mad Pride.

This year, it did. Literally. I wasn't expecting it and reviewing the last five days, had I known this was going to happen, I would have taken a holiday. I wasn't prepared. Now, I think I'm prepared for anything.

Ahhhh, the power of lived experience. But I didn't have a clue last Friday, when I announced I'd be writing about Mad Pride this week.

Since then, I've been deluged. I try to answer the comments I receive and the personal emails, especially if they're from people stressing out. This week, for some reason, many people decided to connect with me. To "come out" to me! And I respect them and engage with them. How can I ignore a cry for help? It's not my nature.

My email box is overflowing with unanswered personal emails. Personal questions from people who need to share their life stories of survival and suffering. 

And asking advice. 

That's one thing I don't do – advice.

Like whether you can emotionally handle the rocky terrain that's covered in the Tony Award winning Broadway musical Next to Normal if you have a family' history of bipolar disorder.

How can I answer a question like that? I'm still processing it, but the short answer is, this is a remarkably hopeful rock opera. Judging from the spontaneous standing eruption of applause as the show ended and the empathetic and heartfelt comments I overheard leaving the theatre in June when I flew down to see it, people were touched, surprised, and visibly quite uplifted with what they had seen, heard and experienced.

When I'm not posting here, I'm keeping up with other activities related to mental health and wellness – this week Mad Pride was the focus. I'm always learning. There's so much to learn.

And speaking of learning, I have another life, you know.

Right now, I'm a teaching a course called Women in Canada, part-time at Seneca College of Applied Arts and Technology. I've taken over the last half and I'm getting to know about 18 new students and helping them through the shell-shock of adapting to a teacher with a completely different teaching style than my predecessor, who created the course around 1971, when I graduated from Seneca with an Applied Communications Media diploma. Now I've come full-circle.

On Wednesday morning, following my two-hour class and a stream of students who came to see me to ask questions about assignments and connect with me personally, I rushed home to ready my house for the annual Board Meeting and Summer Social of the Executive of the Seneca Alumni Association I belong to and I offered to host.

I only slept for about four hours that night. My female Dandie Dinmont Terrier Lucy is in season right now, so she wakes me up at 5:50 a.m. 

Yesterday, all I wanted to do was write my post and plan my lesson for today's class at Seneca. But that wasn't going to be. I was too drained physically to concentrate intellectually, plus I received requests from several journalists for interviews. After all, it's Mad Pride Week, and I've been musing about it since last week.

Then, on top of that, a journalist from CBC Radio's current affairs show, The Current, called yesterday at 3 p.m."just to chat" about Mad Pride and what it means to me. 

Some question. Huge. Mammoth. The answer is endless. I couldn't resist. I can go on all day with an open-ended question like that and I did, for about 80 minutes until I and the journalist ran out of time even though I was just getting up to speed. 

I was late. I was behind in my lesson planning for this morning's 8:00 a.m. class at Seneca. I was late posting for you. I had to get all gussied up for this family affair at my sister's and I didn't even know where to begin. 

It was pure madness. Art imitating life. And my life felt out of control. I desperately needed sleep, but that wasn't going to happen because when we came home after the dinner at 10:30 p.m., I still had to finish my lesson planning and then try to think of yet another brilliant insight about Mad Pride for you.

And I was empty. Dry as dirt. I couldn't think yet I couldn't sleep. And that's my tale of madness. 

So I'm signing off right now and going to bed. It's 3 p.m. If I don't, I'll go out of my mind, crazy, bananas, nuts, bonkers, insane, mad, manic. Sleep heals my mind. I hope you'll forgive me for not writing another word about Mad Pride.

Because as far as I'm concerned, we each have to find our own answers, our own paths, our own meanings, our own ways to live peacefully with ourselves. 

There is no magic bullet. it's a life-long process. Not just one day a year or even one week. It's every day, 24/7 – all year, every year,all your life. That's what Recovery is and as far as I'm concerned Mad Pride and Recovery are joined at the hip. It's not easy, quite the opposite. It's often painful – a series of struggles – but it's worth it. 

Now, for me? Sleep.

Hugs.

 

More on "Mad Pride" and "Knowing Your Rights Day" ...

Happy Mad Pride Day!

July 14 – A Universal Day of Liberation from old stereotypical thinking about mental health and mental illnesses. To challenge mental health discrimination and prejudice. To educate and enlighten and declare ourselves. To celebrate who we are, educate ourselves and others and remember our history. To break out of denial. To stop being afraid. To end our silence.

To be proud.

Wow, is "Mad Pride" ever a red flag issue, though? At least on this continent.  

Not in England and other countries, where "madness" is an increasingly acceptable word to describe having a diagnosis of a psychiatric or "mental illness" and that's very significant. 

Just click onto the comments to my last post, In the mood for Mad Pride 2009 to see an intriguing discussion that took place over the weekend. Not quite a repeat of what happened in the comments to my post about 2008 Mad Pride Week. That really upset people. Big time. 

So, we're making progress. One step at a time.

This morning, I received a Facebook invitation from Mary Ellen Copeland of the Copeland Center for Wellness and Recovery to join her group called "Mental Health Recovery and WRAP© – Wellness Recovery Action Plan". Copeland is one of the leaders in the U.S. mental health recovery movement and she has a remarkable recovery story, herself. 

I met the Stephen Pocklington at a conference last year and posted all about WRAP. These eight week programs offered in Toronto and all over the U.S. Worth considering if you want to add more tools to help you with your recovery. It works!

There is a profound relationship between Mad Pride and Mental Health Recovery. As I see it, they go hand in hand, even if you choose not to describe yourself as "mad" and feel more comfortable with the term "mental illness." Whatever works for you!

My friend Tufts University psychiatrist Ron Pies, a valued presence here at "Coming Out Crazy",  suggests that being very specific is probably most helpful and healthy. 

Here's what he says: "As for how people diagnosed with so-called mental disorders ought to refer to their conditions, I think its often best to name the specific condition, such as 'I have an anxiety disorder' or 'I have bouts of depressions.'"

Everyone is different and should find their own "comfort zone" – and it's doesn't have to be carved in stone. You may find yourself changing and evolving. "Coming Out Crazy" is a process. It can take years.

These days, I don't run around town saying seriously that "I'm utterly mad." (Although, I do less seriously, in certain situations, among friends and people who know me.) What I usually say is that "I'm in recovery from a unipolar mood disorder. I'm not bipolar. I have never been clinically depressed. I get high. Very high. Not happy. Insane, crazy, nuts, mad!" 

I feel comfortable making a little fun of myself and playing with words and I can pull it off. I've been out all my life. I've had years of practice. It wasn't as easy when I was much younger, as it is now.

It depends on context, of course. Where you are. Who you're with. We're all different. I'll often add that, "This is a very rare, very serious mood disorder. I've been hospitalized about 20 times for mania. I get psychotic. It's no fun. Trust me! But I haven't had a major manic episode since 1988." 

When I talk about myself that way, more often than not, people are comfortable asking me questions. That's when I can self-advocate and educate. It's a win-win-win! That's how you can bring about change, one person at a time. It works. 

That's my brand of Mad Pride. Why don't you try to think about yours. Everyone feels differently. How do you describe yourself and feel about yourself? Why not comment about your brand of Mad Pride and if you don't have one, pretend you do. Put words to your thoughts. Brainstorm. Add your thoughts and comment on them, here.

After all, this is Mad Pride Week. It's the one week in the year when Madness is on a lot of minds. Have some fun with it. Think about some positives. Break out. Be a little optimistic. Cockeyed Optimistic! Think outside your box! Forget about the old resonating ideas for a minute. Just be free. Take a deep breath and for a moment, remember that you are you! There's no one on earth like you. Never has been and never will be. You have special gifts. Try to turn your thinking around. 

Be proud of where you are right now. If you're here, you're in a good, safe place. And we're all here together with you!

One last word – five really important words, actually – before I list highlight tomorrow's Mad Pride Week activities. 

These are the five key concepts for Mental Health Recovery according to Mary Anne Copeland.

• Hope

• Personal Responsibility

• Education

• Self Advocacy

• Support

Meditate about them, too.

Now them, tomorrow, Wednesday July 15th, is "Know Your Rights" Day during Toronto's Mad Pride Week. 

Here's what's on tap. Click here for an overview and details about location.

From 11 a.m. to 12 noon: The Dream Team, a group of "consumer survivors" who advocate for safe, secure and affordable house for people living with mental health and addiction issues will share their stories. Over the last year The Dream Team worked with various groups and communities across Ontario to explore the issue of discriminatory zoning. In this presentation members of the Dream Team will illustrate the concept of discriminatory zoning and the impact on people with mental health and addiction issues. 


At 12 noon to 12:15 p.m. The Parkdale Activity Recreation Centre or PARC Ambassadors Program is a remarkable grassroots community success story. This Parkdale Community consultation program engages, informs and consults with residents and stakeholders in the community in relation to their building development at Edmond Place. Nine Ambassadors, PARC Members, receive remuneration for their peer and member driven work, which incorporates and builds on the principles and values of the recovery model and PARC’s Mission – PARC – A Place Where People Rebuild Their Lives. 

When the Parkdale Activity Recreation Centre acquired Edmond Place from the City of Toronto to develop affordable, social housing for marginalized persons in our community there was extreme opposition to PARC by residents and stakeholders in Parkdale. Since the PARC Ambassadors Program's inception in September 2007 this inner-city community has evolved from a NIMBY (Not In My Back Yard) neighbourhood to a YIMBY (Yes In My Back Yard) neighbourhood. 

The PARC Ambassadors Program is proof positive that through community organizing and public relations, marginalized people have a commitment to their community. They have all the necessary attributes and capabilities to be productive, to contribute to their neighbourhood and to society. They can a do live a healthy, meaningful and fulfilling life. This is a powerful snapshot of recovery.

PARC Ambassadors will discuss their work at this presentation 

12:15 noon to 1 p.m. Lunch – light refreshments generously provided by The Raging Spoon

*RSVP: http://www.madpridetoronto@yahoo.ca

Special lunch time presentations featuring Laughter Yoga with Salimah Kassim-Lakha, and more!

1 p.m. – 2 p.m. – Presentation – Legal Jeopardy by Parkdale Community Legal Services (PCLS)

2 p.m. to  3 p.m. – David Carmichael

QUESTIONS, QUESTIONS, QUESTIONS

When it comes to treating your own mental illnesses, we often assume that doctors and other mental heal professionals always know what’s best. During this presentation, David will raise a few issues about scientific drug research and help you understand, based on his own experience recovering from major depression, how important it is for people living with mental illnesses to take responsibility for their own recovery and rehabilitation by asking their doctors and mental health workers questions, questions and more questions, and by becoming regularly physically active. 

David holds a masters degree in physical education and is the former director of national projects at ParticipACTION. After experiencing his first major depression in 2003 at the age of 45 and a relapse in 2004, he tragically learned the importance of good mental health and does not assume that doctors always know what’s best.

A Q & A session will follow.

3 p.m. – 4 p.m. Street Nurse Beth Pelton 

Beth Pelton is a registered nurse currently working with Street Health Community Nursing. Most of her nursing work has been in the community, and with people living with cancer. Her experiences have included working in medical and geriatric and psychiatric nursing, practising from a Harm Reduction Philosophy.

Mad Pride can help you on your Recovery journey. Go for it!

In the mood for Mad Pride 2009...

Since I started writing "Coming Out Crazy" 15 months ago, I've been on the steepest learning curve of my life. 

At least twice a week I sit down here facing a blank screen on my trusty iMac to muse and investigate issues around mental health and wellness that matter deeply to me and I hope to you, too. Particularly Recovery. Plus any relevant news. These days, there's lots of it.

Your comments are my only barometer, my only way know if I'm plucking at a few of your psychic chords. I live for your reactions, to hear your voices, to learn more about you and this community we've created.

Today, I am launching a short series on Mad Pride, which means many different things to many different people. I believe that Mad Pride is analogous to Recovery because they both share one very crucial quality. Hope.

Perhaps you'll think about what Mad Pride means to you. If you want to know the truth, I'm glad to be mad. I know I'm not normal and I wouldn't want to be. I'd rather be Next to Normal. I think everyone is. No one's normal. 

Being different and proud of it affords me enormous freedom, though I've worked hard to get here. Now, thanks to my psychiatrist Dr. Bob and his brand of talking therapy, I don't ever have to dare to be different. I simply am different. I like being different. That's part of my madness. I'm fine with it.

Some of you don't like the term "mad" or "madness" but perhaps you'll change your mind by next week at this time.

Anyway, here goes. A few annotated highlights for the first day or two of Mad Pride Week in Toronto.

• Mayor David Miller has once again officially proclaimed next week, beginning this Monday, July 13 and ending on Sunday, July 19 to be Mad Pride Week 2009. 

Incidentally, according to a PsychCentral 2007 post on its World of Psychology blog, July is considered Mad Pride Month.

And for all the folks of MindFreedom International, Mad Pride is central to its ethos as a "movement that celebrates the human rights and spectacular culture of people considered very different by our society."

For this "non profit organization that unites 100 sponsors and affiliate grassroots groups with thousands of individual members to win human rights" and alternatives for people labelled with psychiatric diagnoses, Mad Pride is a constant campaign – one of many.

NOTE: This year, due to the City Worker Strike, many of Toronto's week long Mad Pride Week Activities will take place at the May Robinson Auditorium at 20 West Lodge Avenue. That's one block east of Landsdowne and one block north of Queen Street. 

This year, Mad Pride Toronto is up to the minute electronically.You can follow our local Mad Pride Toronto events by watching them on YouTube. Or read the Mad Pride Toronto Blog. Or by following on Facebook.

Mad Pride is a cultural festival of arts, entertainment and heritage activities. Several activities honour and commemorate the contributions of men and women who lived, worked, struggled and died in the former Toronto Hospital for the Insane which was located at 999 Queen Street West.

Here are a few events that intrigue me:

• At 6 p.m. on Monday, July 13, you won't want to miss Geoffrey Reaume's unique historical guided tour of The Patient Built Wall, constructed in 1860 by unpaid patient labourers in what was then known as the Provincial Lunatic Asylum. The Centre for Addiction and Mental Health (CAMH) now stands there. Patients lived and died building that wall and Reaume, author of the landmark history Remembrance of Patients Past – Patient Life at the Toronto Hospital for the Insane, 1870-1940 is well-acquainted with their stories. Soft-spoken, thoughtful and profoundly knowledgeable, Reaume teaches a course in Mad People's History at York University, where he is an Associate Professor. He is also co-founder of the Psychiatric Survivor Archives of Toronto.

• At 8:30 p.m. a Candlelight Memorial will take place at the wall.

• Tuesday, July 14, is Mad Pride Day globally. It's celebrated from the United Kingdom to the United States and Canada and from Australia and New Zealand to South Africa. Celebrations vary, but often Mad Pride is an opportunity to challenge mental health prejudices, discrimination and negative stereotyping by raising awareness through community activities and the arts. Music, theatre, poetry, art and literature can transcend so many barriers, especially the unnecessary ones perpetuated by societal and media ignorance and fear.

• It's no coincidence that July 14th is also Bastille Day, the French National Holiday marking the anniversary of the storming of this Paris prison in 1789 that started the French Revolution. It's a universal symbol of liberation and, according to Mindfreedom, "when the Bastille was stormed, two prisoners with psychiatric labels being detained there for that reason were freed."

(I wonder what those psychiatric labels were, back in 1789, before there were psychiatrists.)

• The Honourable David C. Onley, Lieutenant Governor of Ontario, Ontario Human Rights Chief Commissioner Barbara Hall and MPP Cheri Di Novo will be attending the Opening Ceremonies at 11 a.m. on Tuesday morning to kick off Mad Pride Day.

• Following that, a virtual variety show of entertainment, song, poetry and readings is planned.

• At 1 p.m., York University's Geoffrey Reaume will be back to present an intriguing, no doubt healing and historically provocative program called "Hugging Our History: Why Psychiatric Survivors Need to 'Own' our Mad Past." This is a one-hour presentation I'm going to try to see.

• Wednesday, July 15th is "Know Your Rights Day" and features a presentation by The Dream Team – consumer survivors who advocate for more safe, secure and affordable supportive housing for people living with mental health and addiction issues. 

Next week, I'll continue with my Mad Pride series and some surprising information about how Toronto has led the world in the Mad Pride Movement.

The original organizers of Toronto's first "Mad Pride Day" was almost called "Crazy Day" back in 1993. Instead, they decided to call their event Psychiatric Survivor Day." But I'll leave the rest of that story until next week.

Finally, to get yourself into a "Mad Pride" mood, why not download some utterly amazing interviews on Madness Radio – "Voices and Visions from Outside Mental Health." 

Have a peek.

More of that next week, too. Have a "Truly, Madly, Deeply" sensational weekend.

Hugs,

sln