Toddler troubles

Those of you who've read here before about the antics of my exuberant toddler, may be amused to learn of one of his more recent escapades.

We were in Calgary recently, and made the journey south to the town of Okotoks to have an elegant French dinner at a restaurant my recently deceased father really enjoyed. It was a great slow-food feast. But, as all parents know and the other restaurant patrons soon found out, the words "slow" and "food" don't go all that well together when there are toddlers in the mix.

In a desperate effort to keep Alister a little busy, Derek let him play with his Blackberry. Alister hit the emergency button and dialed 9-1-1, prompting two return phone calls from the RCMP.

It reminded me of a story about one of my brother's friends, who was a legendary trouble-maker in his toddler days. Over his mother's shoulder at the Victoria International Airport, this boy once reached out and pulled the fire alarm, causing planes to circle overhead until the "emergency" was resolved.

Have any great toddler trouble anecdotes of your own to share? Comment on this post!

Comments

[Kids Activities]

It is funny, such incidents happens with toddlers.

Kate

[Sharon]

This is long, but possibly well worth it....

I affectionately refer to my youngest son as ButtonPusher for reasons that are apparent to anyone who has a child. I had taken him on an outing and when we got home, I pulled into the garage, unbuckled him and he refused to get out of his car seat. Simply refused.

Actually....hang on just a second. The way I'm typing this makes it seem like he calmly sat in his car seat, silently protesting his removal from the van. Something akin to Greenpeace protesters quietly chaining themselves to a 1000 year old tree so it won't be cut down. No, he did this in his typical ButtonPusher fashion with lots of screaming and kicking and flailing and name calling. I hate you toopid mummy. I no get out. Go way!

I have no idea why he refused to get out but I think it has something to do with the fact that HE'S OUT TO GET ME. Yep. He's out to get me. Pushing my buttons and all that.

Anyhoo........today I tried to handle it in a calm fashion which is normally how it starts out until ButtonPusher manages to push every button I have and I finally lose it. I calmly and quietly said to him "that's fine ButtonPusher, I'll leave the back door open and you can come in whenever you like" His older brother (QuestionBoy) and I then left the garage and went into the house.

I look out the back window facing the yard and I see a miniature Godzilla angrily making his way toward the house. STOMP STOMP STOMP ROOOOAAAAARRRRRR. Toys are being picked up and thrown. ROOOAAARRRRR. He's slamming the garage door open and closed. ROOOOOOOAAAARRRR. Slowly (and loudly) he's making his way to the back deck. STOMP STOMP ROOOOAAAAAARRRRRR. Toopid Mummy! ROOOOAAAARRRRR.

Inside, bluebirds are flying around me chirping merrily, I hold out my finger and one lands upon it to sing a happy tune. I am calm. I am at peace. I will not get mad. I start making lunch and quickly run downstairs to turn on the computer.

Then the doorbell rang.

I run upstairsto get the door and take a quick peek out the back window. Godzilla is still standing there screaming and crying. ROOOOOAAAARRR. I hate you mummy! Please keep in mind that the back door is actually open. I didn't even close it so that he could easily come inside whenever he chose.

I open the front door and there is our BrandNewNeighbour! He moved in two months before and is a young single dad with a two year old boy. I didn't even know he had a two year old boy for the first few weeks because his little boy is so quiet and well behaved.

Unlike another boys I know. No names mentioned... ButtonPusher

Did I mention that I live in a semi-detached house? And that you can hear every little noise emanating through the walls? He must have bought the house when we weren't at home. Poor bastard.

Hi! I say cheefully with a big grin plastered on my face! How are you? He looked at me quite seriously and said.......Your little boy is out in your backyard and he told me he's stuck and you won't help him.

So I did what I normally do whenever my total ineptitude as a parent is brought to my attention.....I burst out laughing. BrandNewNeighbour is now looking at me, not only like I'm a bad parent but like I'm totally insane as well. Which I am. But that's another story.

In between my gales of laughter I managed to sputter "Did he really say that?". Which just goes to show how completely insane I am. Of COURSE ButtonPusher said that. Did I really think that BrandNewNeighbour dressed himself AND his little boy, came out in the cold weather, walked over to my door and rang my doorbell so he could play a practical joke?

I managed to compose myself (somewhat) and explained that ButtonPusher was fully capable and welcome to come inside, he was simply refusing to do so. BrandNewNeighbour laughed nervously, said goodbye and walked away shaking his head.

I closed the door, walked to the other side of the house, stuck my head outside and asked ButtonPusher, "Did you tell BrandNewNeighbour that you were stuck and I wasn't helping you?" ButtonPusher shook his head yes. "Don't do that" I said and slammed the door.

QuestionBoy and I had a nice quiet lunch together with ButtonPusher looking in.

Note: ButtonPusher finally came in house on his own accord 30 minutes later.

[Hand Me Downs]

Hi,

That was so funny. I have a 3month baby now but no such stories yet. Cant wait to see them happening soon. Will let you know once she does anything like this.

thanks for sharing. it was fun to read about it.