Being a good sport

Spirits were a little low at my son's soccer game last week.

The other team was clobbering them and somehow we'd just scored a goal on ourselves (the ball simply hit one of them and bounced into the net).

But that wasn't the part that got me down. The father of one of the stronger players would not stop riding his son the whole time. (Bear in mind these kids are seven and eight.) This dad's message to his son was basically to play more than one position on the field. "Your team needs you," he kept saying. "Try some longer kicks." The instructions did not stop. The look on this child's face revealed his dad really was ruining his fun.

When Serious Dad made some general comment to the other parents on the sidelines about our kids needing to get it together, I had my opening for a chirpy response about it not being Major League Soccer.

What ensued was a stupid conversation with me defending having fun and him insisting you could still have fun while being disciplined. I'm pretty sure my son had a better time at the game than his.

This was just my first experience with those sideline shouters we hear so much about, and I know that many of you have similar - and much worse - stories to tell.

I choose to believe that most parents involved in amateur sport bring a good attitude to the soccer pitch or hockey arena, and I'm taking heart in a BMO Financial Group study conducted by Leger Marketing.

It found that competitiveness was one of the lowest ranked reasons that parents choose to register their children in sports, while 99 per cent of respondents said that fun was important.  Not surprisingly, 97 per cent said that the health benefits were among their motivations. The chance to develop life skills was selected by 96 per cent and the opportunity to develop social skills by 94 per cent.

Some other interesting findings include:

* Four out of five parents surveyed felt that team sports were important.

* Soccer has the highest level of participation in Canada, with 33 per cent saying they would enroll their kids versus 16 per cent for hockey.

* Those living in rural areas were more likely than those in the suburbs to view being outside as an important factor when chosing sports for their children.

We're off to soccer again tonight and I'm planning to give Serious Dad a wide berth. Let's just all remember why we enroll our kids in sports. It's to show them a good time. It's to instill a love of being active. It's to help them make friends and learn to collaborate with others. It's to give them the resilience they can only gain from losing a game and finding that the world doesn't end. It's for the understanding that "you can't win them all" and the sweet feeling of success when they do.

Here's to a great summer on and beside the field!

Kiss and tell

Two stories about kissing have people talking on parentcentral.ca today.

Bernard Weil/Toronto Star

The first addresses the mixed approaches to kissing our kids. On the lips or on the cheek. Who knew this was an issue? It started with New York blogger who got mixed reactions when she wrote about it in her blog. Turns out a lot of us North Americans have a pretty conservative take on what is and isn't appropriate. Check it out.

Rick Madonick/Toronto Star

The second story is about teens with severe analphylactic food allergies.

For them, the prospect of a first kiss is clouded with concern about what their boyfriend or girlfriend has just had to eat.

 

Our sneak peek at the new Lego Store

When I told my son Cameron, 7, that we would be visiting the new Lego Store in Sherway Gardens the day before the Grand Opening, and that (gasp! Call Children's Aid!) I'd be taking him out of school for this, his response was, "I think I'm going to faint."

As some of you know, my boys are NUTS about Lego. They play with it every day, put Lego on their wish lists for each gift-giving occasion, read Lego magazine, visit Lego.com and count their allowance in anticipation of what they might be able to buy. Cameron even had a Lego-themed birthday party.

So naturally, yesterday's outing blew his mind.

The moment we arrived at the store he clapped eyes on the Star Wars Death Star model - a coveted collector's item - in the shop's gallery window. (You can also get a good look at the impressive Tower Bridge set there.)

"I'm Brandie Weikle" I said to the Lego staffers who showed us around. Cam echoed "and I'm in Lego heaven."

 

One of the highlights was this amazing set-up where fans can assemble their own Lego guys.

 

 Cam had a great time with that. SO many smiles on this outing.

 At the "Master Builder Bar" kids can follow instructions to build Lego models using the bricks in the middle of the table, or play games online, as Cameron is doing here.

Immensely popular with the truly commited Adult Fans of Lego (AFOL), the "Pick-a-Brick" wall offers an ever-changing combination of bricks in various sizes and colours, perfect for creative types inventing their own Lego models.

Speaking of creativity, one of my favourite parts was staring into these display cases to see models put together by talented builders who aren't even Lego staff - just fans happy to share. This theatre, complete with skeleton under the stage, is great...

...as is this circus scene.

As we pulled out of the parking lot after our visit was done, Cameron said "My favourite part was just walking around, seeing what they had and being AMAZED at what they had."

If you haven't had a chance to check out my story on the Lego store opening, you may not know that the grand opening runs Friday from 11-7, and Saturday and Sunday from 10-6. A highlight will be the construction of an eight-foot R2D2 in Sherway Garden's central square.

I also wanted to share that I was helped with this story by Phil Fraboni, an adult fan of Lego who plans to be at the opening on Sunday. Fraboni has been playing with Lego since he was a wee boy. His collecting passion today is Star Wars Lego, of which he was around 50 sets. 

Here he is showing off some of his assembled Star Wars kits. So dedicated is Fraboni to both Lego and Star Wars that this weekend will also see him trooping with the 501st Legion Canadian Garrison in London dressed in Star Wars: The Clone Wars Captain Rex armour.

His mother is a much better Lego mom than I am. She saved all of his sets from childhood INCLUDING THE INSTRUCTIONS! Fraboni plans to put these all together once he has the display space!

You can follow Phil Fraboni on twitter at twitter.com/hamcam.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Mom the Vote at the polls today!

At the risk of stating the obvious, the final and most important thing you can do to #MomTheVote is make it to your polling station today to cast your ballot.

Seriously. Don’t let anything short of hospitalization or other family emergency get in your way.

Many of you could be looking upon your schedules today and feeling a little stressed. Casting your ballot between work and dinner, or while keeping the baby asleep in her stroller, may seem like just another task piled upon you.

I ask you to consider that only a comparably privileged existence can allow for that viewpoint. Think of the places in the world today where people are going to war for the right to do what we lucky folks can look upon as just another thing to cross off the list.

Graham Hughes/THE CANADIAN PRESS

So how are you going to make this happen? Have you put a voting plan in place? Mine is to leave the office a smidge on the early side (you’re entitled to three hours off if you need it), get my boys from their two schools and take them with me.

Their dad and I have been talking up the election and explaining the process, as we aim to do whenever there’s a chance to vote. It’s a great way to make the democratic process real for the kids. As perturbed as he is that he can’t cast a ballot himself (we did our best to explain using a theoretical Kids’ Party that would cancel school and make ice cream an official food group), Cameron, 7, is keen to understand how it all works.

He's been tagging along on voting day at every opportunity, even one rough time when he was a toddler complaining intermittently of “something [imperceptible] in my eye.” Even when awkward parking and snowsuits were involved. Even when a trip to a church basement fit about as easily into my evening as a root canal.

But you know what? When he’s allowed to vote, I’m absolutely sure Cam will make the effort. (Besides, we’d disown him if he didn’t.)

To cut corners tonight, I’ve planned a simple dinner of grilled cheese or BLT sandwiches with fruit for dinner. I know this meal will come together quickly after I get home with tired kids in tow and it's a relief to have something so easy on deck.

What’s going to work at your house? If your extra-curricular schedule is super demanding this evening, ask yourself what it would say to your kids if hockey or band was given more importance than exercising your democratic right?

Maybe you can even create a fun new ritual around election night – one that your kids can look forward to each time. Could you ride your bikes there together, or watch a movie when you get home? Could you arrange to meet a neighbour and let the kids run around on the grass while you take turns casting ballots? It doesn't matter what you do just as long as you get there.

So tonight, skip something. Order pizza. Go for a post-vote milkshake. Do what you have to do to make your voice heard.