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Potty Mouth Mom


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« Will I ever get a break? | Main | Ah, grandparents. »

December 09, 2011

I'm laughing smugly in my quiet home.

When I told a friend Ted was taking Hudson on a three day trip this weekend, leaving me home alone with Scarlett, she responded with "woohoo" for me and bid my husband "bonne chance."

He needs the luck!

Below, a brilliantly written e mail from Ted to me, after he and Hudson landed in New York this morning, where they're visiting family. 

Here's what you need to know before you read: 

I stayed home because I'm tired and wanted a "free" (only one kid, the easier kid!!) weekend. 

Ted's mom Elaine is accompanying my boys on the trip.

We forgot - until minutes before Ted and Hudson left this morning - that we need a notarized letter from me permitting Ted to take Hudson out of the country. So, I wrote one by hand on a sheet of scrap paper.

Ted forgot to bring along a pacifier (yes, my son is addicted to his paci. A lot more on this in a soon-to-be-written post) and, panicking, bought a sub par sub when he got to the airport. "Oh my god, we don't have a paci," Ted said over the phone, about 10 minutes after his car pulled away from our house this morning. "Good luck!" I said.

Grandpa Louis, is Ted's beloved, deceased Grandpa Louis.

This e mail is in response to one I wrote asking: Are you guys there yet? How was the flight?

Ok, so Huds had the BIGGEST tantrum that I have ever seen in my life or his.

He was happy as we got our tickets, but as we started on the customs line, he wanted to bolt away and run back to the ticket area. I caught him and he started BALLING. And screaming: "Mommmmmy, Mommmmy, I WANT MOMMY!!!" So I took him out of line to calm down, and let him roll around on the ground, and he was yelling and crying and screaming "Mommy" for at least 10 minutes. He was inconsolable.

Eventually a lady came out and said we could go straight to a Customs agent. Which was good because I thought we'd miss the flight, but bad 'cause I'm thinking: this kid is screaming "mommy" and his strange dad is trying to take him out of the country. But he was nice...he asked for the note, said it wasn't a great note (I guess because not notarized) and then said ok, no problem.

But Huds was still kicking and screaming and flapping out of my arms. The couple times he got quieter he asked for his pacifier and, when I gave him the substitute, he immediately spit it out and it just enraged him further.

So what could be worse, right? Well, they decided at security to randomly check me AND Hudson. Seriously. His check involved swabbing Hudson's hands. Seriously. And they full-body-scanned me, but of course, I had to give Huds to my mom which caused him to freak again.

But finally finally we got to the waiting area, saw some planes, and he started to calm down.

And then we got on the plane and was PERFECT. A perfect angel. So happy, so chatty, hungry for crackers and juice, hugging daddy, perfect. Asked for the pacifier a couple times.

So we're getting off the plane, they bring out the stroller and say "a few coins fell from your stroller pocket". I go to pick up 2 toonies and I look up and guess what: the real pacifier is in his mouth!!! It was in the stroller too and fell out - but did not fall out the 4 other times I folded and stored the stroller. I felt like it was Grandpa Louis shining down on us as soon as we arrived in NYC - it was sort of a miracle.

And as soon as we got him into the car - boom - asleep. And now we're at the hotel and he's still sleeping - 2 hours later.

What's new by you????

Love,

Ted

 

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