I threatened to start jogging last week but have been putting it off.
So, here we go ...
Into the closet.
I don't go for the typical, effete jogging attire. No shiny vinyl short shorts with piping.
I would never wear a headband, even if it was all I had to stanch the bleeding from a massive head wound.
I like to keep it simple. Nothing fancy.
Not like those running club nuts. Since when did jogging become so complicated?
Some nights more than 10 of these people will run up and down my hilly street.
They wear what look like neoprene suits with reflectors everywhere, bouncing lights off the dazed eyes of drivers trying to to get home from work and park their cars.
I used to walk out on my front porch to enjoy a cigarette and quietly chuckle at these uncoordinated folks shuffling along in frighteningly skin-tight clothes, going up and down the street (for some reason they religiously avoid the sidewalk), trying to eke out words of encouragement to each other but choking on their own phlegm. You'd think they were climbing Everest or running the Boston Marathon.
What happened to solitary and simple? What happened to grey sweats?
Okay, so I've found some old jogging pants from my university days.
They seem to have shrunk a little after hundreds of washes, but they should do. Though I am a little worried the legs will ride up above my ankles.
I've also found a simple grey sweatshirt. Though the elasticity in the cuffs has gone. I hate it when I push up my sleeves and they just roll back down.
And, finally, I found some running shoes in basement storage. A pair of New Balance trainers. Thing is, I never wore them that much. So I can tell they're going to rub my big toes raw.
I can do this.
I get changed, make sure my iPod is fully charged.
But I notice that all I have is the standard-issue iPod earphones, the white ones attached by a loose wire. I find those don't stay in place like the earphones with the rigid over-the-head structure.
I take a deep breath and open the front door.
But there's a fine dusting of snow on the sidewalk.
Probably safest if I wait until tomorrow.