At least I'm not -- ouch! -- in the -- ouch! -- infirmary (yet)

Sorry I’m a bit late today.

Fingers are sore, back’s broken, legs are gone and it was everything I could do just to drag this sorry old carcass out of the sack this morning.

But there was no time spent in either an ambulance or an ICU so things could have been worse.

Anyway …

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Eighty.

Eighty holes of golf.

I can tell you, my friends and neighbours, that is an awful lot of golf. Not a lot of good golf, just a lot of golf. Just ask Eric Smith, the cart-mate who journeyed around the course with me yesterday.

Now, it was more speed golf than anything – two balls per hole at least (sometimes four on par-3s) but each ball played out tee to cup – and there were, um, relaxed winter rules in the fairways, rough everywhere else. But still had to swing the club and make the putts and walk a gawd-awful amount of steps across fairways and greens and tees.

And, you may not all know this, but I’m not in tip-top athletic shape.

The goal, however, wasn’t to set scoring records, it was to raise money for the Spina Bifida and Hydrocephalus Association of Ontario and that we did.

The final accounting is still to come but it looks like they got raised more than $30,000 and that’s nothing to sneeze at.

I thank you, the good people at the association thank you. My body? It’s been reminding me that it’s not in favour of such hijinks.

Oh, the score? To protect future sandbagging opportunities, that shall remain a state secret.

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About last night

What have we been telling you?

What we’re seeing is validation – as regulars here might tell you – of one of my pet peeves and oft-made points.

No one guy can “carry a team” for any significant length of time.

There can be no dispute that LeBron James is playing spectacularly – although it will be a frosty day in Hades before Kobe Bryant commits eight turnovers in a crucial playoff game, methinks – and yet his team is on the verge of elimination.

Why? Because never, ever, ever, ever, can one guy do it alone. It doesn’t work for Chris Bosh in the regular season, it’s not working for LeBron or Kobe in the playoffs; it hasn’t worked ever in the past, it won’t work ever in the future.

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A recollection

As I watched Rafer Alston dominate all I could really think about was how glad his fans must be that he didn’t retire after that night in Boston with the Raptors.

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Admit it

You all thought that last-second mid-court heave by LeBron was going in, didn’t you?

I sure wouldn’t have been surprised.

But in Brian’s game story here, he admits even he knew right away there wasn’t another miracle to come.

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Changing of the guard

JOHN RAOUX/AP

Congratulations Anderson Varejao, you are the new face of the Those Who Don't Believe They Have Ever Committed A Personal Foul club.

You all know how much I love and respect Dikembe Mutombo but I’m afraid he has lost one of his places in my heart.

Anderson Varejao is now, officially, the worst whiner and aggrieved party in the history of Those Who Don’t Believe They Have Ever Committed A Personal Foul.

Honest to the Great Deity who guides our lives, if I watch Varejoa raises his arms in disbelief after hacking someone, or watch him complain every time the whistle blows, I may throw something through the television (a happenstance that will upset Super Wife and Super Son quite a bit, I’d imagine).

The guy is unrelenting in his complaining.

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This abacus sucks

Okay, so my point yesterday about technical fouls in the post-season was arithmetically flawed (I don’t have enough fingers and toes to do that kind of calculation either) but the point remains the same.

They need to increase from seven the number of techs they allow in the post-season before they start suspending guys.

It’s arbitrary anyway so why not make it 10? Or 12?

The one Howard got last night was, I guess, technically a technical, he did a very small amount of taunting and if you strictly by the books he probably should now be just one away from earning a one-game suspension.

But the level at which “taunting” technicals are handed out is so subjective, I cannot believe that one warranted a call. And I would also not be at all surprised if we didn’t find out today that it had been rescinded.

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So, I hear that Chris Bosh, on his website, promises some big announcement on Monday?

Don’t get your knickers in a knot. I presume – and this is a presumption based on only a couple of conversations – that it’s got something to do entirely divorced from anything about the Raptors.

It can’t be a contract extension – they can’t even talk about that until July; I don’t think he’d all of a sudden have a change of heart about declaring any huge 2010 intentions.

But I will say this: It’ll drive traffic to his site and that’s what it’s all about.

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What about the West? As strange as it is to type this – and it’s probably strange to read it, too – the Nuggets might be all but dead without the play of J.R. Smith the other night.

The guy of whom it’s been said takes more bad shots than anyone in the history of basketball seems to be maturing in front of our very eyes. Odd but a very welcome sight for the Nuggets.

And here’sa pretty good read on him that gets to both sides – good and bad – of his game.

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All right, have about 30 comments from yesterday to post and a handful of Advil to eat like they were Smarties. And we will be here tonight about 9 to chronicle Nuggets and Lakers if anyone wants to join in.

Comments

[doug]

I know we all use sports as a diversion from everyday life...but mention needs to made about Mike Tyson's young daughter's passing..no matter what anyone's views of Tyson are, no parent deserves to live thru the passing of a child...it's a horrendous thing, and very sad and heart-breaking...remember this when we argue a officials call, or a writers opinion, life is real sports is a retreat from it....prayers to Mike, his wife and the poor sib that found his sister....

[Eric G.]

Say what you will about SVG, but he really is outcoaching Mike Brown in this series. The last play was a great adjustment by SVG. They couldn't get the ball in bounds and he noticed Wallace guarding Lewis. So next play he sets a pick on Wallace to free up Lewis. That's how you gotta coach in the playoffs.

[DH]

There have been a bunch of calls either way that will eventually cancel each other out. Sure it might have been a soft call on Pietrus. But if the game was in the regular season Howard would've been called for sticking his rear out on Lewis' 3pt shot with 4 seconds left.

Cleveland's problems lie with coaching adjustments and their players in ability to step up. No its not because Cleveland is missing a point guard. They don't need a guard like that since the ball runs through Lebron 95% of the time. Cleveland's biggest issue is guys are not knocking shots down. Williams / West and crew have had open looks after open looks. They just haven't made enough of them count. This is what happens in the playoffs all the time. Its a time when guys either step up or fold. So far the Cavaliars minus Lebron are folding.

[Thane]

I don't see the point of increasing the TF limit to 10 - if you're going to put it up there, why not just eliminate the tech foul suspension in the playoffs?