In case you were wondering, here's what will happen

Human Pinata time.

Take your shots.

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And the winners are:

Really, why wait until May? Inscribe the trophies now:

MVP: Kevin Durant.

Why not go with the sexy pick and be like all the other cool kids.

Seriously, if he keeps the Thunder on the same track they were on last year, why wouldn’t he have a shot?

Sixth Man: Steve Blake

No, seriously. Steve Blake. You figure he’s going to get all kinds of time behind the aging Derek Fisher on a pretty darn good team and the kid’s got some game. You want another longshot? If the Magic is outstanding, I can see JJ Redick getting some love.

Rookie of the Year: Blake Griffin

I haven’t seen the Clips at all this pre-season except in highlights but I’m told the quasi-rookie has been crazy good. And since I think the Clips might actually do something this season, he gets the nod over John Wall, who is on a worse team.

Defensive Player of the Year: Thabo Sefolosha

All right, so maybe he doesn’t play an awful lot because the Thunder really like James Harden but this dude guards all kinds of positions and I’m tired of giving it to Dwight Howard every year. Think KG’s got one kick at the can left in him? I don’t.

Coach of the Year: Jerry Sloan

Look, the guy has to win it once, doesn’t he? I don’t care if it’s a Career Achievement Award, he’s got to get it. Besides, I don’t see a sexy pick out there at the moment although I can see Vinny Del Negro making a move if the Clips are any good. And wouldn’t that just frost the cake of the folks in Chicago?

Most Improved Player of the Year: No clue.

Really, I don’t. Some guys vote for guys who have better numbers because they play more minutes; some guys for vote for guys whose teams are vastly improved. Some of us wait and ask around in April and cast ballots accordingly. Count me in the latter group at the moment. But the early pick would be Minnesota’s Kevin Love, although the Timberwolves will still suck.

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All right, so I’ve checked with the Poo Bahs at the Mother Ship and we’re all set for a question-and-answer session on Wednesday to kick off the season.

Trouble is, we have to go at 1 p.m. instead of our traditional noon start so everyone book late lunches, okay?

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The Divisions? In Order? Why not? EASTERN CONFERENCE

Atlantic: Boston, New York, Toronto, New Jersey, Philadelphia

Look, someone has to finish second, third, fourth, fifth and it’s a very, very, very, very shallow pool we’re talking about here. Who knows, 32 wins might finish behind Boston and ahead of the rest of ‘em. There are huge questions about every team not called the Celtics and it’s a crapshoot, I can see none of the other four teams getting to 32 wins, actually.

Southeast: Miami, Orlando, Atlanta, Charlotte, Washington.

Gutsy pick, eh? Heat to win? Well, you know, you could make the case that a slow start in Miami while they work things out and a blistering start by the Magic might make this a neck-and-neck race for the final three months of the season and that’d be cool. I’m more interested in how long it takes for the inevitable Agent Zero meltdown.

Central: Chicago, Milwaukee, Indiana, Detroit, Cleveland.

Another one of those “shallow pool” thingies but I kind of think Milwaukee’s still a playoff team, although I do see some kind of “bounce” off an over-achieving year. The bottom two teams are going to rival the worst in the NBA, methinks.

WESTERN CONFERENCE

Northwest: Oklahoma City, Utah, Portland, Denver, Minnesota

This might be the most competitive division in the league. But can you see Denver imploding after a Carmelo trade and a Kenyon outburst and George Karl finally strangling JR Smith? I can and except for the presence of Old Friend Chauncey Billups, I think it’d be cool to see.

Southwest: San Antonio, Houston, Dallas, New Orleans, Memphis.

Just shined up the crystal ball and Tony Parker has a huge contract year, Tiago Splitter helps ease Tim Duncan’s load and Matt Bonner lights it up. I love the Spurs. And if there’s one guy in the league I’m rooting for more than any other it’s Yao Ming.

Pacific: LA Lakers, LA Clippers, Golden State, Phoenix, Sacramento

Yes, I am on the Clipper bandwagon and I know Despicable Donald Sterling will do something to screw it up but I don’t care. And maybe Baron Davis will try for 60 games? And, yes, I fear for Phoenix’s playoff hopes and I cannot wait for the “can the Raptors trade Bargnani, Jose, Julian Wright, Solomon Alabi and the Smith Kid for Nash?” questions. Really. I cannot wait.

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Playoffs? Who’s in?

East: Miami, Orlando, Boston, Chicago, Atlanta, Milwaukee and two other teams. Really, it’s impossible to say, isn’t it? Health, chemistry, schedule, stuff all play a huge factor. But if you held a gun to my head, and I’d really appreciate it if you didn’t, I’d probably go with Charlotte and one of Indiana-New York-Toronto-Washington. And I have no clue who that’ll be. You guys and gals fight over it.

West: Lakers, San Antonio, Oklahoma City, Utah, Portland, Houston, Dallas, Clippers. Told ya I have some love for the Clips but I know they’ll screw it up somehow. The fallback is Phoenix and their Gang Of Small Forwards and I suppose you have to think that Denver at least hangs around until the last couple of weeks.

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The Champs?

You know what, someone has to beat the Lakers ‘cause they’re No. 1 going in. I’d expect them to get off to a slow start with Kobe coming back from surgery and the predictable ennui setting in, but who cares? It’s all about May and June to that team and they have more than enough experience to win it all even if they don’t have home court advantage.

The East? Well, it’s easy to pick Miami and you couldn’t argue too hard against it. But, what the heck, I’ve liked Orlando for a couple of years and no sense pulling back now, is there?

So buckle up for the Lakers-Magic next June.

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Tomorrow? The Heroes of the Hardcourt.

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Comments

[gord mcneice]

I am so tired of the assumption that Barbosa is automatically considered sixth man on this team. HE'S OUR BEST PLAYER!!! I would love to have someone go back in NBA history and show me the team that had it one of its top two players as their sixth man. Havlecheck was Boston's sixth man earlier in his career, but they were smart enough to recognize he grew to be a core player and started him later. Your best player (and during the preseason he proved it) needs to play against the other teams best. You may argue against that but you need to show me what NBA team would agree with you. We seem to be putting himi in a role he doesn't need to play in, just because he played it Phoenix.

Blogger's note: Is Manu the second-best player in San Antonio? How about Jason Terry in Dallas?

[Michel G]

Triano's honesty in the scrums has caught me off guard lately. Particularly his comments on Bargnani's help defense and his (in)ability to lead. That they know what kind of player he is; that there are no secrets after four years. It's been refreshing. Are coaches around the league that up front also?

Blogger's note: Like any industry, a few are better than others.

[D-Mac Ottawa]

@doug and Doug, Thanks for the contraction insights. I've always stayed mostly clueless about the business end of the NBA stick (the stinky end) because it's just never really interested me. My bad. I love the flip side, though (the talent end), and simply enjoy watching the product show its stuff out on the floor.
I'd think contraction would be one of those "short-term pain, long-term gain" things, but, stinky business as usual, it's always 'hey, let the next guy spend his nickel, I'm keeping mine'. If it wasn't like that, we'd have replaced oil 30 years ago and half of Wall Street would be pacing 4 by 6 ruts in their cell blocks.
Yep, come evening, I'll stick to my sports. Cheers. Go Raps! Go Rangers!

[The J]

If you think Bosh checked out, you must have really forgotten what Vince looked like in the last season and a half in TO. Now I just wish Hedo would have checked in.

[doug]

@D-MAC ..I agree with you 100%,,,there should be contraction in the NBA and NHL and MLB..as their just isn't isn't enough talent to go around..it's just a watered down product and your exactly right in my opinion...if the NBA let's say, sucked it up and said okay were getting rid of 2 teams, take the financial hit, the negative spin-off financially for a bit they in the end would benefit from a stronger product and in turn more valued franchises...and right now would be a excellent time to do it as the economy and financial markets are in a downturn so no one is loking to "buy" a franchise right now...so take this time to contract, make your product stronger for when the economy does hit a upturn..and investors are looking for a place to spend their money..Sacramento should go, arena issues amongst other things as well as Memphis possibly ....

[Robert]

"has not resembled his starry past or $9.8 million salary" Arizona Republic talking about Hedo Turkoglu - We all know this to well here in T.O...His name is Jose Calderon at undrr playing big time at the same type of money! lol

[Joe U]

Hi Doug, you probably already saw this, but it's a nice Article / Q&A with Alex English

http://www.slamonline.com/online/nba/2010/10/original-old-school-poetry-in-motion/

[J]

@Gord McNeice:

"I am so tired of the assumption that Barbosa is automatically considered sixth man on this team. HE'S OUR BEST PLAYER!!! [...]"

There are plenty of other considerations that you completely neglected, and the opposite of your argument could be made as well: where does it say that a weak team must start a player simply because he's one of the team's top three players? You make it sound like he's an all-star. In fact, you even compared him to Havlicek.