On the royal trail in Calgary: A Beverly Hillbillies second coming?
Yellowknife to Calgary: One step closer to becoming The Beverly Hillbillies' Jed Clampett
The royal trail moved south from Yellowknife on Wednesday. Now, the royals are free from the media until 4 p.m. in Calgary (or 6 p.m. Toronto time) on Thursday. Here are the lessons I learned along the way:
1) Checking your carry-on luggage just so you don't have to buy razors in Calgary is not worth it. Especially when a section of your luggage gets ripped apart in transit and all of your toiletries spill onto the luggage conveyor belt at the airport. At least your precious $4 10-pack of razors is safe.
2) Losing personal effects is just a part of a tour that moves quickly. Instead of taking a little bit of a certain province with you, you're leaving a little bit of yourself with a province. And isn't that really what it's all about? In Quebec, a nice pyjama set. In Yellowknife, your only nice pair of shoes. In Calgary, a BlackBerry is left in a cab and then miraculously returned. At this pace, you're going to show up in Los Angeles in your Birkenstocks, your luggage closed up with safety-pins, filing a story into a tin can phone. The second coming of Jed Clampett.
3) Guessing where the royals are on their day off is not a very fun game. It only takes a few minutes. Banff? They must be in Banff, right?
4) The Yellowknife airport is a really cool place. Where else is a luggage conveyer belt surrounded by a taxidermied polar bear chasing a taxidermied seal through fake ice?
5) The Calgary Stampede is a really serious business. In the Calgary airport, they sell sequined cowboy hats with flashing lights around the rims. You'll wonder what you've stepped into, and then, sitting in your hotel room will be a big white cowboy hat, size extra large. You wonder what's waiting in William and Kate's room. Chaps? Probably chaps.
- Katie Daubs