R.I.P. J.D. Salinger

ASSOCIATED PRESS, NEW YORK — Catcher in the Rye author J.D. Salinger has died at age 91 in New Hampshire. The author's son, in a statement from the author's literary representative, says Salinger died of natural causes at his home. He had lived for decades in self-imposed isolation in the small, remote house in Cornish, N.H. The Catcher in the Rye with its immortal teenage protagonist — the twisted, rebellious Holden Caulfield — came out in 1951 during the time of anxious, Cold War conformity. Salinger wrote for adults, but teenagers all over the world identified with the novel's themes of alienation, innocence and fantasy. In later years, Salinger become famous for not wanting to be famous, refusing interviews.

This is where a cold, shallow person would write something thoughtless about how we're going to miss his op-ed pieces, his wry tweets and his on-air punditry. I, of course, will do no such thing.

Thank you, internets. That didn't take long

This is the approximately 5,617th "Hitler reacts to ..."  video. It will never stop. WARNING: some profanity.

Cat seance

Stupid idiot of the day

Stop the presses! Jessica Simpson farts during a meeting

Trust Us Weekly to fearlessly report the intricate goings-on of show business and celebrity. This week they're revealing fascinating details about Jessica Simpson. She's no just a kinda pretty face, she's also a serial farter. Such diversity.

"A source tells Us Weekly that Jessica Simpson had a, ahem, windy moment during a business meeting for her denim line in late January. "While one of the executives was speaking in a room full of five people, Jessica let out a very loud fart," says the insider. "Her mother [Tina Simpson] was there, and it prompted her to turn around and yell, 'Jessica!' The tension was extreme. No one knew what to say." It wasn't Simpson's first brush with public flatulence: She famously cut loose on an episode of Newlyweds, telling then-husband Nick Lachey, "You love my stinky ass," and professed her fondness for between-the-sheets poots (a.k.a. Dutch ovens) to a radio station in 2008. Maybe someone told Gerard Butler about her gassy fascination! When the actor, 40, with whom she shared a flirty dinner in October, joined her group at West Hollywood's Boa Steakhouse January 23, he steered clear. "They didn't sit next to each other," notes an employee. "She seemed to be nervous around him."

This is just, well, wonderful

Apparently, back in the olden days of 1998 when Titanic dethroned Star Wars at the box office, George Lucas sent this to Jim Cameron. Via Buzzfeed.

Sarah Polley finds financing

Good news for Sarah Polley's Take This Waltz, as reported by Hollywood Deadline: Sarah Polley came to Sundance to promote the thriller Splice. Michelle Williams was there to launch Blue Valentine. But now they’ve got a reason to get together this summer. I've learned that Polley has secured the financing to direct her script Take This Waltz. Williams will star with Seth Rogen in the romantic triangle. The script made the most recent Black List of 2009's best unproduced screenplays. Polley will set another actor shortly to round out the cast. The producer is Susan Cavan. Deals are coming together quickly for a July production start in Toronto, with an independent financing package that includes Telefilm Canada, private equity, and gap financing. That’s similar to Polley’s last directorial effort, 2006's Away From Her which earned her a Best Adapted Screenplay Oscar nomination. Williams, who’ll next be seen in the Martin Scorsese-directed Shutter Island, turned in a Blue Valentine performance that has generated a lot of great buzz at Sundance. She stars with Ryan Gosling the brutally honest drama about the erosion of the relationship between a young married couple. Derek Cianfrance directed the script he wrote with Joey Curtis.

Poor, sad Jennifer is counting the hours

Star Magazine knows what's what: "Jennifer Aniston and Brad Pitt shocked the world five years ago, when they ended their picture-perfect marriage. But now that Brad and Angelina Jolie have signed a breakup contract dividing their $350 million fortune Last time I broke up with someone I got some old socks and a cassette tape, Jen is ready to forgive her ex — and take him back!  In the Feb. 8 issue of Star, we report that Brad and Angie have now accepted that it's not a question of if they break up but when! Tell me! Tell me! When is it. Better not be on the weekend. I'd be so disappointed. Make it a Tuesday, please. Brad reached out to his ex for support — exchanging phone calls and text messages before an emotional face-to-face meeting at the Hope for Haiti Now benefit on Jan. 22. "He knew she would console him, like she always did when they were together," an insider tells Star. And as they talked, Jen realized that she loves and misses Brad — and wants him back in her life. Sorry. Wait. Time out. According to every single tabloid in creation, she's been loving and missing him for the past five years, so how can she just have realized it now? "She's never had a relationship live up to what they had what do you mean? Gerard Butler seems like a very stable, settling-down kinda guy, and now that things with Angie are finally ending, she’ll take him back," says a friend. The day after the telethon, Jennifer called Brad up and admitted the spark was still there, and she knows he felt it too. “The moment he and Angie make it official that they’ve called it quits, she’s ready to try again.” What did Brad say when Jen declared her feelings? "You're crazy. Get yourself a hobby or something. There must be other things you can do with your time. Now I have to go home and spend some time with MY SIX CHILDREN!" What's the next step for the duo? Get the scoop — as well as all the details on Brad and Angelina's split — in the new issue of Star."

Best thing of the day

Yes, it's early. But I'm willing to bet a very small amount of money that nothing better will turn up today.

A tiny look at the Mad Hatter