Unicorn thing of the day

I'm going to have to completely rewrite my letter to Santa. (Thank you very much, Karen). Because now I want the Avenging Unicorn Playset from McPhee. "Everyone wants an imaginary unicorn friend that they can call forth to smite their enemies. The Avenging Unicorn Play Set has everything you need to use the power of the unicorn to rid your life of irritations. Put the posable, 3-3/4'' tall, hard vinyl unicorn on a flat surface and then impale one of three 3-1/8'' tall, soft vinyl figures included. Also includes four interchangeable horns (classic spiral, chrome, glow and pearlescent)."

I also want the unicorn messenger bag. It has the Unicorn Code written on it. And I think we can all learn from the Unicorn Code:

1. Unicorns never cheat.
2. Unicorns always lend a helping hand.
3. Unicorns don’t talk to strangers.
4. Unicorns respect the Earth.
5. Unicorns are never late.
6. Unicorns aren’t conceited.
7. Unicorns don’t judge people.
8. Unicorns always give 100%.
9. Unicorns graze on peace and love.
10. Unicorns don’t do drugs.

My favourite rule is Rule 5. I hate people who are late. There's something seriously wrong with them. They use stupid rules like Rule 7 when they argue with you.