But, Mr. Keller, I'm confused. I'm a white-girl atheist who likes to kill things in my spare time when I'm not helping redistribute wealth. Up until now I've mostly used my bare hands for the killing, but I'm developing carpal tunnel syndrome. Can I take your class? (via Buzzfeed).
Also, Mr. Keller. You sound like a very nice man, but you can never be my favourite Mr. Keller. (WARNING: This is from Oz, so there's some violence).