Kim Kardashian files for divorce
I'm not one to laugh at the misfortunes of others (spoiler: I totally am), but his is just too funny. Also: it will teach you to never discount what the tabloids are saying. Here is Kim wearing the Sacred Divorce Vest of Ugly at some party this weekend. (Mike Coppola/Getty Images).
TMZ has this: "Kim Kardashian filed for divorce this morning, after 72 days of not-so-wedded bliss to Kris Humphries ... TMZ has learned. We're told even though the marriage was short, she will not seek an annulment. It's a garden variety divorce, in which Kim cites "irreconcilable differences." The date of separation is listed as today, Oct. 31, 2011. According to the docs, Kim wants Kris to foot his own lawyers' fees and she'll pay hers. And, she wants the court to reject any move by Kris to get spousal support. Kim has hired disso-queen Laura Wasser, who has repped the likes of Britney Spears, Maria Shriver, Angelina Jolie, Ryan Reynolds, and Robyn Gibson, Mel's almost ex-wife. As we first reported, the couple has a prenuptial agreement ... Kim made sure of that. Rumors of a split had been swirling for some time and the two were spotted out to dinner earlier this week ... looking less than pleased with one another. The couple was married on August 20 in a lavish ceremony in Montecito, CA. There are reports that the wedding cost as much as $10 mil, which means $138,888 for every day until today."
BUT WAIT! THERE'S MORE! "Kim Kardashian will never, ever move to Minnesota ... everyone knows that ... except Kris Humphries. Sources close to the former couple tell TMZ ... one of the main points of contention in the marriage was where the couple would live after all of the wedding madness finally died down. We're told Kris was passionate about eventually settling down in Minnesota, where he's from ... and believed Kim was on board with the plan. She wasn't. IN RELATED NEWS: KRIS IS NOT THE BRIGHTEST, SHARPEST BULB IN THE KNIFE BOX Sources tell us Kim - who's from L.A. - wants to stay near her family ... and she also feels that staying in town is the best thing for her career. So why didn't this conversation come up before the $10 million wedding? We're told the two talked about their future ... but got caught up in the hooplah and figured they would simply figure it out after they tied the knot. Sources say it's not a nasty break-up ... but we're told the two have come to a realization that it's not a long-term fit."
BUT STOP! DON'T GO! THERE IS EVEN MORE! "Kris Humphries desperately tried to save his marriage to Kim Kardashian, because he's telling friends ... he doesn't believe in divorce. Kris, who's a religious guy, is telling friends he and Kim discussed the possibility of divorce, but he believed they could work their problems out. We're told Kris didn't know Kim was actually filing legal papers until this morning. And, Kris is telling friends ... the stories that he was cheating on Kim are B.S. We're told Kris is "bummed." LIKE, TOTALLY. JUST LIKE THAT TIME WHEN HE HAD A FLAT TIRE AND THAT OTHER TIME WHEN HE REALLY WANTED McDONALDS AND THEY WERE CLOSED.
STOP! DON'T GO! US HAS THIS: The reality star also confirmed the news to Ryan Seacrest. "Yes @kimkardashian is filing for divorce this morning," Seacrest tweeted. "I touched base with her, getting a statement in just a few minutes." "There were rumors up until the wedding and after the wedding," Seacrest added Monday during his radio show. "Looks like this is true and she is filing this morning (Oct. 31)."
This story is, or course, trending on Twitter.
Mmmmm ... the delicious sanctity of marriage. We will now count down to the inevitable sad, sad statement about how it just didn't work out but everyone will remain good and caring friends.
WAIT! HERE IT IS VIA PEOPLE: "I hope everyone understands this was not an easy decision," she says in a statement to E!, which airs her reality shows. "I had hoped this marriage was forever, but sometimes things don't work out as planned. We remain friends and wish each other the best."
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