PAY TO PEE? HOW ABOUT ON-BOARD PAY LOCKERS?

It's not particularly shocking, but users of skyscanner.net have said that hidden airline charges are "the most annoying aspect of air travel."

Charges for checking-in hold baggage, fuel surcharges and booking with a credit card received 24% of the votes for most-annoying. Right behind at 23 per cent was "queuing for security and boarding, followed by lack of seat space (15%), fellow passengers (11%), having to check in so early (8%), bad staff attitude and poor customer service (6%), sitting on the runway waiting to take-off or disembark (4%), having to bus to and from the plane (4%) and waiting for your luggage at the other end (4%)."

Obviously this poll didn't have enough users of Pearson, or the "waiting for your luggage" number would've been A LOT higher. It's my pet peeve, but honestly, how can it take so long?

Skyscanner head of marketing Rob Innes said: “It’s incredibly annoying when you see a great flight deal, only to find the actual price is considerably higher once you’ve added all the extras," and AMEN to that, Mr. Innes.

Just for fun, and possibly inspired by Ryanair's talk about customers having to someday pay to pee, the Skyscanner folks also came up with a list of potential new ways for airlines to make money, including:

- A successful landing fee – to be paid upon disembarking the aircraft following a safe touchdown
- Coin operated overhead lockers, window blinds and seat lights
- Charge a premium disembarking fee – pay to get off the plane first
- Fee for releasing oxygen mask, then extra charge per minute of oxygen consumed
- Passenger weigh-in: surcharge of one british pound (about $1.80 Cdn) per pound of weight

- Surcharge for children as they generate less revenue from onboard sales (they can’t buy alcohol)
- Life jacket optional – extra fee if you want one.

Ya gotta love it.

PORTER ON THE MOVE

The good folks at Porter Airlines, always good for a provocation of Mayor David Miller, have announced their first foray into Northern Ontario. Porter plans three-times-a-day flights from the Toronto Island airport to Thunder Bay beginning June 26.

Porter keeps insisting it's doing great business from the island, and I keep seeing planes go by outside the window at 1 Yonge Street, so we can only assume they're in this for the long haul. And the short ones.

EMERY BOARDS FOR EVERYONE

There's a national business travel association meeting going on at the Toronto Hilton, and they were giving away lots of pens and notepads and luggage tags and such at a reception on Tuesday night. West Jet was giving out triangular-shaped, plastic-thingy's that you pop open to find three colours of magic markers, as well as emery boards for filing your nails.

"Our most popular give away item," a West Jet chap told the Star.