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October 05, 2009

Crazy English menus...WTF – oops...Visit Britain (& PEI & Florida)...Deal of Day

I really don't mean to make fun of people’s English. Lord knows I don’t speak French worth a damn. Or Chinese at all. So I'm sorry about this. But I still have to laugh when I read funny English translations on menus in foreign countries.

 

In Beijing last year I found a place advertising “Special tufei hog foot,” which I hadn’t tried in years. Another was “Tasted Chicken Wings.” I never figured out who had tasted them, but I sure as heck didn’t.

 

When I was in Athens for the 2004 Olympics, a lovely taverna I used to go to offered braised lamp. It wasn’t bad if you remembered not to chew the wires.

 

Anyway, I get versions of bad translations on the Internet now and then from friends or family. The Daily Telegraph in the UK (www.telegraph.co.uk) had a great collection the other day. Here are some of my favourites:

  - chicken of your mother

  - braised fresh Dave (Letterman, I presume)

  - chops of sucking lamb to the iron

  - beef barely soup (hey, I had that in the Star cafeteria last week)

  - the palace explodes the diced chicken

  - big breasts (you oughta see the lineups)

  - cool pee with strawberry milk

  - minority park surprise (Michael Ignatieff's a big fan)

  - grilled paving stone

  - from the grandfather immature meat and a roasted sausage and a fish and rich variety the our work.

 

OMG - A WISCONSIN MIXUP

 

Hadn’t noticed this in the papers in Canada, but it seems the Wisconsin Tourism Federation had to change their name when someone – gee, really? – pointed out to to them that the acronym WTF had a certain meaning in this Internet/instant messaging era. Amazing nobody thought of it a couple years ago, but Wisconsin folks are amazingly polite and well-mannered and a bit naive, I think, and it probably never occurred to them. Still, they recently swapped the name to be the Tourism Federation of Wisconsin.

 

Good call.

 

PRINCE EDWARD ISLAND ON SALE

 

Tourism PEI is offering an additional 20 per cent off already reduced off-season rates for hotels, cottages, B&B's and inns for stays until Oct. 15. Go to www.tourismpei.com for more information.

 

VISIT BRITAIN

 

Visit Britain Chairman Christopher Rodrigues dropped by the Star last week to fill me in on what's happening. Food, of course, was a topic of discussion, as everyone seems to be raving about the improvements in British cuisine in the last decade or so.

 

"I was recently at a dinner at our embassy in Paris with a French travel writer," he said. "When it was over, he said, 'You’ll never find food this good in Paris.'"

 

I hadn't thought of it, but Rodrigues said the rise of gastro pubs in Britain is in part due to drinking and driving laws and smoking bans.

 

“People can’t smoke and drink all night in a pub, they had to find something” to bring in customers, he said, and it sounds plausible.

 

Rodrigues said he's continuing to stress the values in Britain these days.

 

 

“Because of the recession, you can book a four or five-star hotel and get five nights for the price of four or four for the price of three; things like that.”

 

With the pound still hovering down around 1.70 to the Canadian dollar, there are remarkable days. I went to London last November and found a decent hotel near London.jpg
Hyde Park for $70, which is astonishing. Throw in free museums and do your fancy dining at lunch and London is suddenly quite reasonable.

 

"It's been 25 years since we had this kind of price point," Rodrigues said.

 

AND NOW FOR SOMETHING COMPLETELY DIFFERENT…FLORIDA

 

Had a coffee later on Friday with St. Petersburg/Clearwater’s Mary Haban. Folks in one of our favourite corners of the world are outing a new Hyatt Regency Clearwater Beach and Spa, due to open mid-December. The new Salvador Dali museum in St. Pete's is slated to open in 2011and will dwarf the current model.

 

AND DON'T FORGET HAITI

 

Former U.S. President Bill Clinton was in Haiti last week urging Americans _ and I’m assuming he’d be happy to have Canadians go – to visit the country and give the fledgling tourism industry a boost.

 

He took a VIP trip to a mountain palace and a nearby beach where they’re building a cruise ship pier, AP reported. Not quite hanging with the people, but his intentions are good. I did a magazine review a while back and talked about a writer who spoke glowingly of Haiti.

 

JIM'S DEAL OF THE DAY

A stay at a Four Seasons is reward enough – but the Four Seasons Hotel Chicago is throwing in a $100 (U.S.) gift card just for good measure. Guests will receive a $100 gift card per night, for use at The 900 Shops at 900 N. Michigan Avenue when booking one of the hotel’s new one- and two-bedroom superior suites, for travel through Dec. 31. The deal also comes with free daily parking and ‘Midwest breakfast’ for two daily. Programs at the hotel include Thursday night’s ‘Dine Without Whine’, a family-friendly set-up allowing adult guests to dine in peace and quiet while their kids have fun at their own special dinner buffet with movies and video games, under the care of a babysitter. For details see www.fourseasons.com/chicagofs.

CHATEAU FRONTENAC BECKONS

The Fairmont Le Château Frontenac is celebrating its $116th birthday with a special anniversary offer of $116 per night. The deal is valid for stays between October 25 to December 17. Go to www.fairmont.com/frontenac or call 1-877-692-3861.

The deal is based on double occupancy and covers the Fairmont room category. Rooms are based on availability and must be booked seven days in advance. Full deposits are required and the offer isn't valid in conjunction with any other discounts or for groups.

 

 

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Travel Blog by Jim Byers


  • Jim Byers

    Jim Byers is the Star's Travel Editor. He has been writing travel stories for more than a decade, covered five Olympic Games and spent years covering the Blue Jays, the Toronto Raptors and the PGA Tour. He's been everywhere from Bonavista to Vancouver Island, as well as China, Hong Kong, Australia, the Caribbean, Thailand, Mexico, Tahiti, New Zealand, Vietnam, a dozen countries in Europe and just about every major city in the U.S. Okay, he was only in Liechtenstein for a couple hours in a rental car and his only visit to New Orleans was when he was 12, but you get the picture.

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