Adventures of a would-be gardener
So, last Friday I left work totally eager to dig into my gardens. I was ready to take the leap and weed with confidence to create a well-tended backyard oasis, all I needed was the sunshine.
And, sure enough, Saturday morning dawned bright and clear. So I pulled on my cute little purple gardening gloves and went to work. A few hours later, there was a giant heap of weeds ready to be put into lawn bags and I'd learned a few key reasons why I'd avoided gardening for all these years:
1. There are bugs. A lot of bugs. Creepy, crawly, slimy bugs. I don't do well with insects, as recently evidenced by my shriek (which was enough to rouse Mr. Speedy from the basement) when an antzilla (that is, an unusually large ant) crawled onto my shoulder while I was brushing my teeth. I was not impressed.
2. It's dirty. Gardening gloves are helpful, but you'll still get dirt under your fingernails, and some prickly plant bits might still make their way through. Some people find digging in the dirt relaxing. I am not one of those people.
3. It's hard work. Some of these weeds had a month or more to take root, and pulling them out was tough. Not to mention all the squatting and bending in the hot sun.
4. And, last but not least, all my hard work resulted in a very itchy, blotchy rash up both of my arms. I don't know what caused the reaction, but it was certainly less than fun. Thankfully, the rash has subsided, and I can now at least see some humour in the situation! Plus, if anyone talks trash about my gardens, I can now pull out the sympathy card with "I'm trying, but I'm allergic."
So, out of 10, I'd rank my gardening successes at about a 5 — not a total wash, because the gardens do look better, bu definitely not a perfect 10, thanks to the rash and all.
And the experience has helped me determine my philosophy for the garden — aside from some cosmetic weeding, I think I'm going to let the plants in my garden be judged by a "sink or swim" approach — if they don't survive this summer, good riddance. A little bit of sod tamped down in their place, and no one will ever know the difference!